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"MARRIAGE" In The News
(September 2007) |
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The news articles and features presented below are simply an indication of how topical, controversial, and all-encompassing the issues surrounding marriage are throughout our society--and the world-- today. Some of the views and opinions expressed, and their respective web sites, do NOT reflect the views or opinions of The Real Proposal™ magazine. Many are highlighted largely to reiterate that the alarming statistical trends on the chaotic state of "Marriage" and "Family"--outlined in "A Mere Glimpse"--will continue unabated without a fundamental grasp and purposeful dissemination of TRUTH on the issues.
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- Love woes: private pain, public gain The Age- AUSTRAILIA, By Max Markson, September 30, 2007
Why do women like to read about spurned women in women's magazines? Well, if you have to ask that question, you're obviously not a woman. Actually, I'm not a woman, either, but I do know the answer. Women love to read about high-profile celebrities going through relationship problems because it makes them feel better about themselves. They like to read about Jennifer Aniston's break-up with Brad Pitt, and Nicole Kidman's break-up with Tom Cruise and Pamela Anderson's break-up with — well, just about everyone — because it makes them realise that life on the other side of that velvet rope isn't all that perfect after all. Oh, sure, they like to read about celebrities in the first place because they are glamorous but, at the same time, there is something very reassuring about knowing that even the rich, famous and surgically enhanced find it hard to hold on to a man. . . .Not that it's only women who like to read those stories, you know. Oh, yeah, your man might shake his head and laugh when you pop that New Idea or Woman's Day into the shopping trolley, but you should see him make a grab for it when you head for the bathroom. And why? The rescue fantasy. . . .
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RELATED ARTICLE: Fab Tab Cover Stars Forbes.com, By Lacey Rose, October 2, 2007 RELATED ARTICLE: Jennifer Aniston covers sell celebrity magazines New York Daily News, October 4, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Wronged women sell magazines The Age- Austrailia, By Michelle Griffin, September 30, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: The High Price of a Broken Heart Psychology Today, By A.J.S. Rayl, June 22, 2007
The heart is the honorary seat of emotion—and no wonder. Experience, mood, temperament, and thought style can profoundly alter the ticker. Dispatches from the hidden superhighway between heart and mind. . . .
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- LUST LIFE: Emotional Affairs- The limits of restricting yourself to one mate New York Press, By Stephanie Sellars, September 2007
Once upon a time, when I was miserably monogamous, I experienced what is commonly referred to as an “emotional affair.” Every few weeks, my “lover” and I rendezvoused for dinner in dimly lit restaurants and spent timeless afternoons at the Met. He was a painter, so naturally I posed nude for him. When sexual tension became as thick as the oil paints he slapped onto canvas, I broke off our posing sessions. We continued to see each other, however, in the innocent world of dinners, museums, art openings and movies. We connected through similar tastes and aesthetics—the delicacy of a line, the beauty of a floating space—details that my boyfriend couldn’t see. These details seemed to reflect the lines and spaces within me, intricacies that also eluded my boyfriend—and yet my not-quite-lover-but-more-than-a-friend “got” them. Sometimes we held hands or kissed, but never more than that. It was an old-fashioned courtship, an erotic friendship. It was sublime. But I should have cut him off! I should’ve known that non-sexual romance would jeopardize the relationship with my boyfriend! That affair inspired me and satisfied a hunger, but I must say that it was wrong. Why? Because it opened me to the awareness that deep emotional connections can be felt with more than one person at a time. Isn’t that a terrible consequence? These ironic afterthoughts are part of my reaction to Heather Johnson Durocher’s article in the August issue of Redbook, “The Affair You Don’t Know You’re Having.”. . .
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- A 'gay' guide to GOP candidates World Net Daily, By Joseph Farah, September 27, 2007
Salon magazine recently performed a public service for homosexuals – publishing a thorough "gay" guide to the GOP presidential candidates. But it's not just a public service for homosexuals. It's also a public service for those of us who see the homosexual political agenda as extremely dangerous to the very survival of our nation. I thought I would perform a public service myself by making it unnecessary for you to read through a voluminous report in a publication littered with soft-core porn, obscenity, vulgarity and profanity by summarizing it right here. . . . . It seems to me homosexual activists have more choices among the Republican candidates than do traditional Republicans. . . . .
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- Democratic Candidates Say They're OK With Second-Grade Teacher Reading Gay Prince Fairy Tale FOX NEWS, By Catherine Donaldson-Evans, September 27, 2007
A fairy tale about two princes falling in love sparked a backlash — and a lawsuit — against a teacher and a school last year when it was read to a second-grade class in Massachusetts. But the three frontrunners in the Democratic presidential race suggested Wednesday night at their debate in New Hampshire that they’d support reading the controversial book to children as part of a school curriculum. Moderator Tim Russert asked John Edwards, Sen. Barack Obama and Sen. Hillary Clinton whether they’d be comfortable having the story — called “King & King” — read to their children in school. Edwards gave the first and most definitive answer — a resounding and instant “yes, absolutely” — although he added that it “might be a little tough” for second-graders. Obama agreed with Edwards and revealed that his wife has already spoken to his 6- and 9-year-old daughters about same-sex marriage. Clinton said she believes it’s up to parents to decide how to handle such topics, but added that it’s important to teach kids about the “many differences that are in the world.”. . . . . . Clinton said she respects the viewpoints of Obama and Edwards, but she sidestepped the question of whether she’d be comfortable having a storybook like “King & King” read to her own child at that age. . . . . Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, who is vying for the Republican nomination for president, weighed in afterward with a statement accusing the Democratic candidates of being “out of touch” with America. . . . .
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RELATED ARTICLE: Why Liberals Make Atrocious Parents TownHall.com, By Kevin McCullough, September 30, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: The prince married a man, and lived happily ever after: Religious groups attack circulation of books raising gay issues among primary school pupils The Guardian Unlimited- UK, By Anushka Asthana, March 11, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Controversy Over Kid's Book Depicting Gay Marriage CBS4 Boston, April 20, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: Since same-sex marriage is legal in state, administrator says no parent ok needed WorldNetDaily, April 19, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: District lifts ban on parent over pro-'gay' book- Father allowed on campus, but notification policy unchanged WorldNetDaily, Nov 23, 2005
RELATED ARTICLES: David Parker -- his arrest, court appearances, abuse by school officials, harrassment by pro-gay activists in town, and federal civil rights lawsuit! Mass Resistance.org
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- Will the Media Cover THIS Story? TownHall.com, By Kristen Fyfe, September 26, 2007
. . . . There it is, the G word. The mainstream media are, shall we say, selective in their coverage of homosexuality as well. They collectively went nuts when Senator Larry Craig’s solicitation of ‘gay’ sex in a Minneapolis airport bathroom became public knowledge. However, they typically turn a blind eye to nudity and sexual acts occurring in broad daylight during “pride” parades. Public nudity is commonplace, as is sadomasochism, at the Folsom Street Fair. The fair’s Web site proudly promotes pictures of past events to prove the point. According to Concerned Women for America, “The most unimaginable and vile acts of debauchery are commonplace during the fair. Senator Larry Craig was arrested and driven out of the Senate for allegedly soliciting public ‘gay’ sex, yet during this event the city of San Francisco suspends the law and allows ‘gay’ men and women to parade the streets fully nude, many having sex – even group orgies – in broad daylight, while taxpayer-funded police officers look on and do absolutely nothing.” And so we ask again: Will the mainstream media cover the Folsom Street Fair?. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Folsom Street Fair Reminds U.S. of What “Gay Pride” Means TownHall.com, By Frank Pastore, September 30, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: When Blasphemous Gays Rip into Christians the MSM says Diddly Squat TownHall.com, By Doug Giles, September 29, 2007
RELATED SITE: Folsom Street Fair (Rated MA: For Mature Viewers Only)
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- 10 frequently asked divorce questions: Get answers to some of the most important questions about separation and divorce Homemakers.com, By Anne Bokma, September 2007
Deborah Moskovitch wants others to learn from the mistakes she made when she got divorced. And there were plenty, not the least of which was allowing the divorce to drag on for seven years. "I realized there were huge lessons to be learned and I wanted to share them with other people," says Moskovitch, a 48-year-old mother of three who began her divorce odyssey 11 years ago and now operates her own divorce consulting service in Toronto. Moskovitch sat down with Homemakers Magazine to give anyone contemplating or just beginning a divorce the benefit of her 20/20 hindsight. Here are the answers to all those questions you never thought to ask, are too embarrassed to ask or never knew whom to ask:
1. My husband and I don't love each other anymore, even though we don't fight. Should we stay together for the kids? . . . . 2. Don't my kids deserve to know the truth -- that my husband cheated on me?. . . . . 3. How do I find the right divorce lawyer for my case?. . . . . 4. Can we get divorced without going to court?. . . . . 5. My ex spoils the kids and has few house rules. What if the kids turn against me for being more strict?. . . . 6. Help! I'm jealous of my ex's new live-in girlfriend. . . . . 7. Why are my old friends avoiding me now that I'm divorced? . . . . 8. I want custody of the children. At what point should I state this?. . . . . . 9. How do I deal with my family's disapproval of my divorce? . . . . . 10. I'm lonelier than ever when the kids are with my ex. How do I fill the empty hours? . . . .
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RELATED ARTICLE: Dr. Bad News Salon.com, By Cathy Young, October 3, 2000
After conducting a massive 25-year study, Judith Wallerstein concludes that children of divorce are hit hardest after they grow up. RELATED ARTICLE: Unexpected Legacy of Divorce PBS.org, December 19, 2000
Judith Wallerstein discusses her latest book, "The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce," an analysis of the long-term effect of divorce on children. RELATED ARTICLE: Transcript From Chat with Dr. Judith Wallerstein PBS.org, April 18, 2001 RELATED ARTICLE: Family stress could hit employers' bottom lines Springfield Business Journal, By Dr. Jennifer Baker, September 10, 2007
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- Health Issues: Certain types of cancer mean higher divorce rates, experts say CBC News- AP, By Maria Cheng, September 27, 2007
- People who develop cervical or testicular cancer may face another harsh reality: they are more likely to get divorced, a new study says. In research presented Thursday at a meeting of the European Cancer Organization, Norwegian experts found that women with cervical cancer had a 40 per cent higher chance of getting divorced than other women. Men with testicular cancer were 20 per cent more likely to get divorced than similar men without cancer. Both types of cancer are curable and mainly affect young people. "Sex could have something to do with this," said Lesley Fallowfield, a professor of psycho-oncology at Sussex University who was not connected to the study. "If men and women with cervical or testicular cancer aren't having sex with their partners, that may be a problem." For nearly two decades, the study looked at 2.8 million people in Norway, comparing the divorce rates of 215,000 cancer survivors to those in couples with no cancer. They did not ask couples about the reasons for the divorces, but only looked at marriage and divorce registration data. . . . .
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- 111 Across: Will You Marry Me? Puzzle Lover Plants Marriage Proposal in Sunday Crossword ABC News- Good Morning America, September 25, 2007
Millions of us enjoy racking our brains over crossword puzzles, but a Boston man saw romance among all those clues. Aric Egmont asked the puzzle masters who create the Boston Globe crossword to help him propose to his girlfriend Jennie Bass. Now the crossword-loving couple are a seven-letter word for "getting married." Since their fourth date, doing the Sunday puzzle in the Boston Globe (in pen) has been the couple's favorite thing to do together. One of us holds it, one of us reads over their shoulder, it is what we do," Egmont said. Egmont thought, why not pop the question in a crossword puzzle? So he asked the editors at the Globe. Doug Most, the editor of the Boston Globe magazine, found the idea "romantic." "I thought it was sweet. I thought it was original," Most said. The Globe played along, and called last Sunday's puzzle "Popping the Question.". . .
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- 'The Bachelor' star Brad Womack narrows the field to 15 bachelorettes Reality TV World, By Christopher Rocchio, September 25, 2007
The 25 women attempting to woo Brad Womack got their first chance during last night's premiere broadcast of The Bachelor's eleventh installment. But when it was over, the 34-year-old Austin, TX bar owner sent 10 packing in his journey to find true love via the long-running ABC reality dating series. . . . . Each of the bachelorettes took a different approach in attempting to make Brad remember her for The Bachelor 11's first Rose Ceremony. Kristy, a 29-year-old acupuncturist from Chicago, IL, examined Brad's tongue and diagnosed that he was "under some stress." Hillary, a 27-year-old registered nurse from Philadelphia, PA, gushed about the broken nose she recently suffered while Erin, a 25-year-old publishing sales executive from Tampa, FL, did one better by explaining how she suffered a broken face twice. Jessica decided to put her skills as an anchorwoman to the test to ask Brad the "hard questions." "The girl right now that stands out in my mind is Jenni," said Brad, talking about the 27-year-old Phoenix Suns cheerleader from Wichita, KS. "It's because of her laugh. Everything I say she laughs at! It could be a bad thing maybe, but I think she's just truly happy." Michele, a 30-year-old realtor from South Brunswick, NJ, tried to put Jenni on the spot by having her showoff some of her cheerleader moves for Brad. However the move backfired when he actually enjoyed it. . . . .
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- Why do so many modern women think being a sex object is cool? The Daily Mail- UK, By Rosie Boycott, September 24, 2007
. . . . . . It is impossible to imagine that any one of these women entered 'the game' out of free choice. Yet according to Belle, the heroine of the new eight-part ITV series, The Secret Diary Of A Call Girl, which starts on Thursday, she loves sex and money and so prostitution was a natural career choice. The series is based on the life of 'Belle de Jour' - the pseudonym of a high-class prostitute - who launched an internet blog in 2003, detailing her daily adventures with men who paid her for sex. So successful was the blog that two books were subsequently published, both best-sellers. Controversy always followed Belle: was this in fact total fantasy (possibly even written by a man) or was this the real thing? Belle claimed to be a young woman in her early twenties, a university graduate who had failed to find a job which satisfied her need for entertainment and sufficient funds to meet her love of clothes, jewels, smart apartments and bling. . . . . . If you were to believe the world of Belle, it's one of the best career moves for a young girl with her heart set on making money in an easy way. There's just one problem with all this: it's nonsense - insidiously dangerous nonsense that should shame the TV makers and publishers behind the Belle phenomenon. . . . . .
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- Lindsay Lohan named in divorce papers of British heiress The Daily Mail-UK, September 23, 2007
A British heiress has started divorce proceedings in the wake of claims that Lindsay Lohan had sex with her musician husband in the toilet of a rehab clinic. Sensational divorce papers identifying Mean Girls star Lohan were filed last week by US lawyers acting for Stephanie Allen, 28, whose family is worth £720 million. Mother-of-two Stephanie, from Lincolnshire, pulls no punches against her husband Tony, 39, the Dead Stays Alive frontman, in the 52-pages filed in Chatham County Court in Savannah, Georgia. Stephanie states that her three-year marriage "is irretrievably broken" and gives the grounds for divorce as his "adultery" and 'cruel treatment.' The papers also accuse her husband of being "guilty of habitual drug addiction" and that she should retain custody of their eight-month-old twins. The lawyers do not name Lohan in the actual complaint but they refer to her husband's "conduct and relationship with another woman" as described in an American magazine and on showbiz internet sites. But Exhibit 'A', which is attached to the divorce papers, includes articles claiming Lohan, 21, who has had an on-off affair with Calum Best, started a relationship with Tony Allen while they were both being treated at the Cirque Lodge clinic in Utah. . . . . .
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- Greg Norman's ex-wife lashes out against Chris Evert The Daily Mail- UK, By Richard Shears, September 23, 2007
She may have accepted a £50million divorce settlement, but the former Mrs Greg Norman is clearly not yet ready to go quietly. And squarely in her sights is the golfer's new love, former Wimbledon champion Chris Evert, whom she accuses of betrayal and blatantly pursuing her husband. "She came after him. I have never seen anything like it," said Laura Norman, who since divorcing the man known as the Great White Shark has reverted to her maiden name of Andrassy. "I would never have thought anyone would be so aggressive (in pursuing him) in front of me like I didn't exist. It just turned into a fiasco. I really don't have a lot of respect for her as a woman. She is not a great person." Miss Andrassy, 57, said she had always considered Miss Evert a friend - until she chased after Norman and then flaunted their love affair. She also claimed that she would still be married to her husband of 25 years if it had not been for the tennis star. Speaking for the first time since her reported £50million divorce deal, Miss Andrassy claimed that Miss Evert had befriended her and stayed in the Norman home with her then husband, one time U.S. skiing champion Andy Mill. Mr Mill, 53, was the golfer's best friend. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Chris and Greg admit they're a team This is London- ShowBiz News, January 1, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Chris Evert's Ex Wishes Her, Greg Norman 'Happiness' People magazine, By Jeff Truesdell, January 3, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Shark 'bite' looms larger Melbourne Herald Sun, Australia -May 21, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: The Big Question: Has divorce become too expensive for the rich? The Independent Online- Legal- UK- By Maxine Frith, May 19, 2006
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- “Not Tonight Dear, I Have a Headache” 4 ways to save your sexless marriage Vanguard- Nigeria, September 23, 2007
If you hear “I’m not in the mood” more than you hear “come hither” whispers from your spouse, you may be among the many couples living in a sexless marriage. When couples aren’t connecting intimately, marriages suffer because ignoring each other’s physical and emotional needs is not how to make a marriage last. If this common marriage problem sounds familiar, read on to find out how to turn your chaste union into a nonstop spicy soirée. . . . . . Once a month? Once a week? Every night? How often must you have sex with your spouse to have what’s considered a healthy love life? There’s no set number. However, experts define a sexless marriage as one in which couples make love no more than 10 times a year. A 2003 Newsweek magazine study concluded that between 15% and 20% of couples fall into this category. That’s enough for experts to label it an epidemic. Sex isn’t the ultimate litmus test of a loving relationship, but physical intimacy is a vital way to stay emotionally connected with each other. Besides, it’s fun!. . . . . . Now, here’s the good news: You can rekindle the intimacy you once enjoyed. Start by following these three rules: 1. Stop the Blame Game. . . . . . . 2. Talk It Out. . . . . . 3. Enlist a Pro’s Help. . . . 4. Take Action. . . .
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- Thai gold-diggers make fools of retired Japanese The Japan Times, By Geoff Botting, September 23, 2007
By all appearances, 71-year-old Shozo Ikeda leads a life many men of his age would dream of. For starters, his wife, Jo, at age 42, is young enough to be his daughter. The happy couple live in Thailand, Jo's home country, where the low cost of living means that Ikeda, a former taxi driver, can live like a king on his pension of ¥160,000 a month. "We bought the house, we bought the car, and now we're going to register our marriage," he boasts to Shukan Post, in the last of a series of articles about Japanese people retiring overseas. As a Japanese living the high life in Thailand, Ikeda is hardly alone. In the city where he lives, Chiang Mai, an estimated 3,000-4,000 Japanese are long-term residents. Like Ikeda, most are elderly and male. What's the draw? According to the magazine, it's largely the local women. For these guys, marrying women half their age or just cavorting with them is a very real possibility in Thailand. "About 80 percent of the Japanese men here have local wives," says Junji Taniguchi, the publisher of Chao, a Chiang Mai-based Japanese-language magazine. So what's in it for the ladies? That answer is also very simple — money. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: How To Land A Rich Man Forbes.com, Lacey Rose, July 25, 2006
RELATED SLIDE SHOW: How to Land a Rich Man Forbes.com
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- 'Can We Talk?' The 10 most important questions you and your spouse should ask each other about retirement -- and probably haven't Wall Street Journal, By Glenn Ruffennach, September 22, 2007
Presumably, most wives and husbands take time to discuss the big issues in their lives: whether to have children, which career paths to follow, and who gets to control the TV remote. So why aren't spouses talking about retirement? A study published earlier this year by Fidelity Investments in Boston underscored what many financial planners already know: Wives and husbands aren't taking time to discuss and plan for later life. . . . We asked financial advisers and couples across the country to identify the most important questions that spouses should ask each other about retirement -- ideally, at least five years before leaving the office. In many cases, their suggestions focused on lifestyles first, and finances second. Here are the most-suggested conversation starters, along with some advice and observations from those interviewed: "Do we really want to retire, and if so, when?". . . . . "What is our vision of retirement -- and do we share the same vision?". . . . . "Where do we want to retire?". . . . . "What's our strategy for building and preserving a nest egg?". . . . "What assets do we have for retirement -- and are they invested in the most beneficial ways to achieve our goals?". . . . "How much money will we need to support our lifestyle in retirement?". . . . .
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RELATED SURVEY: A FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE
In a survey of 502 married couples approaching retirement, wives and husbands often had different understandings of their plans and preparations for life after the office:
• 61% disagreed on which income source (workplace savings, pensions, Social Security, etc.) would be their primary source of funds in retirement.
• 58% disagreed about whom their spouse would turn to for financial guidance in the event of the other spouse's death.
• 41% disagreed about whether at least one partner would work in retirement.
• 39% differed on the amount of their life-insurance coverage.
Note: Spouses were questioned individually. On average, surveyed couples had been married 24 years and were nine years away from their expected retirement. Husbands were 54 years old, on average; wives were 53.
Source: Fidelity Investments
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- Oprah’s uh-oh moment: By backing Obama, Winfrey is abandoning gay, lesbian Americans Washington Blade, September 21, 2007
Queen of Daytime talk Oprah Winfrey is omnipresent. Her monthly oracle — O, the Oprah Magazine — espouses the principles of self-help, self-love and self-giving. Her image floods newsstands. Bookstores stockpile their inventory with her choice for the book of the month. And presidential hopefuls genuflect before her to win votes. Now for the first time, the media magnate is involved in politics. And Oprah threw a star-studded fundraiser for her presidential pick, Sen. Barack Obama. With 1,500 guests at her sold-out private soiree paying $2,300 apiece, Oprah’s endorsement of Obama just might help him buy the election. But her “chosen one” is a candidate who would unquestionably deny gay Americans their full and equal civil rights, especially when it comes to same-sex marriage. “I am somebody who has not embraced gay marriage. I’ve said that it’s not something that I think the society is necessarily ready for. And it strikes me that in a lot of ways for a lot of people, it may intrude in how they understand marriage,” Obama stated on CNN’s “Larry King Live” in late 2006. But nearly a year later, and after being given much more information and education about the essential need to afford gay Americans their full and equal marriage rights, his position is unchanged. . . . .
RELATED RESEARCH: The Oprah Factor in Campaign '08: Do Political Endorsements Matter? Pew Research Center Publications, September 20, 2007
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RELATED BLOG: Oprah Celebrates Homosexuality, Again, as Audience Applauds Americans For Truth, October 6, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: Queen of ignorance? Dallas Voice, By Daniel A. Kusner, September 20, 2007
Latifah recently made some bigoted comments about gay marriage. And she’s coming to Dallas to raise money for a domestic abuse foundation. Doesn’t she realize that prohibiting gay marriage can threaten laws that protect same-gender domestic violence?
RELATED ARTICLE: Oprah's Great Black Hope TownHall.com, By Larry Elder, September 13, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Is The "M" Word The Same As The "C" Word? TownHall.com, By Austin Hill, August 12, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: The Runner-up for "Worst Person in the World" Speaks Out TownHall.com, By Sandy Rios, August 9, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Surprise! You Are Now a Bigot The Pilot, By Michael Pakaluk
RELATED ARTICLE: Don't be manipulated by the master marketers Townhall.com, By Rebecca Hagelin, Oct 4, 2005
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- How to cure seven-year itch? Limit marriage to seven years Times Online- UK, By Roger Boyes in Berlin, September 21, 2007
Marilyn Monroe would have approved. The Seven Year Itch, argues Germany’s most glamorous politician, could be cured by making marriage vows valid for only seven years, thus legislating away what is regarded as the most unstable phase of a relationship. The proposal to turn marriage into a kind of time-share arrangement has shocked Germany. It comes from Gabriele Pauli, who is running to become head of the Bavarian conservative Christian Social Union (CSU) party. “Many marriages survive only because people think it gives them security,” Ms Pauli told a news conference in Munich. “But only love should count.” Her idea would apply only to civil marriages. Vows sworn on the altar, “till death us do part”, would not be amended. Civil marriages would be regarded as a limited seven-year contract. “After that initial period each partner would have to say ‘yes’ again in order to prolong the marriage,” she said. “If they do, there is no reason why marriage should not end up as a lifelong partnership, but in the meantime we will have saved the financial and emotional cost of many divorces.”. . . . . .
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- A Beloved Professor Delivers The Lecture of a Lifetime Wall Street Journal- Moving On, By Jeff Zaslow, September 20, 2007
Randy Pausch, a Carnegie Mellon University computer-science professor, was about to give a lecture Tuesday afternoon, but before he said a word, he received a standing ovation from 400 students and colleagues. He motioned to them to sit down. "Make me earn it," he said. They had come to see him give what was billed as his "last lecture." This is a common title for talks on college campuses today. Schools such as Stanford and the University of Alabama have mounted "Last Lecture Series," in which top professors are asked to think deeply about what matters to them and to give hypothetical final talks. For the audience, the question to be mulled is this: What wisdom would we impart to the world if we knew it was our last chance? It can be an intriguing hour, watching healthy professors consider their demise and ruminate over subjects dear to them. At Carnegie Mellon, however, Dr. Pausch's speech was more than just an academic exercise. The 46-year-old father of three has pancreatic cancer and expects to live for just a few months. His lecture, using images on a giant screen, turned out to be a rollicking and riveting journey through the lessons of his life. . . . . . . . Near the end of his talk, he had a cake brought out for his wife, whose birthday was the day before. As she cried and they embraced on stage, the audience sang "Happy Birthday," many wiping away their own tears. Dr. Pausch's speech was taped so his children, ages 5, 2 and 1, can watch it when they're older. His last words in his last lecture were simple: "This was for my kids.". . . . .
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- Heath Issues: Newlyweds need to get off the couch together Canada.com- The Nest, By Alonna Friedman-Freelance, September 19, 2007
Maybe you've gained the "newlywed nine" or you've been spending so many hours gazing longingly at each other that you've put off exercising and eating right. But now that you've had a few months or years of wedded bliss, it's time to start getting those hearts pumping for a different reason: to get in shape and slim down. With this plan, you can lose weight together. THE PLAN: Encourage and push each other to eat better every night and work out at least three times a week. Set a mental goal now: "We want to lose xxx pounds," or "We want to run a five-kilometre race." Whatever your goal is, say it out loud, tell your co-workers (and mate, of course), hang it on the fridge, and sign up for your "challenge" (e.g., the race). WHY DO IT? Even if you eat right and work out occasionally, this is a chance to really push yourselves and start feeling more in control of your health and your goals. Schedule your daily itinerary around workouts and soon it will be a way of life. And you'll start having more energy and feel less tired -- you won't want to go without it. We know you hear this all the time, but why not give it a shot -- especially now that you have a legally bound partner? WHY TOGETHER?. . . . .
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- Why do unmarried couples opt out of wedlock? CNN.com, By Jocelyn Voo, September 19, 2007
-- First comes love, then comes marriage -- or at least that's how the saying used to go. An increasing number of heterosexual couples have been shacking up without plans for a trip down the aisle. According to a 2003 U.S. Census Bureau report on families and living arrangements, 4.6 million U.S. households were occupied by unmarried couples of the opposite sex. That's up from 2.9 million in 1996."People don't question, 'Why did you get married?' They only ask you, 'Why haven't you gotten married?' " points out Marion Willetts, an associate professor of sociology at Illinois State University. "I think a lot of people feel if you were really serious about your partner and your relationship, then you'd get married." But from what Willetts has found with the life partners she's spoken to, that is simply not true. "They're in this for the long haul," she says. "This isn't just some convenient thing or trial marriage. They're just as committed to their relationship as married people." While Census data doesn't identify couples who have sworn off marriage, Willetts has followed this group in a study of 83 couples she's surveyed over the past few years for her current research, tentatively titled "Union Quality Comparisons between Heterosexual Licensed Domestic Partners and the Legally Married." According to her research, it's not just 20-something social idealists who decline to get married. Willetts has interviewed octogenarians in committed relationships who are not planning to tie the knot. . . . . .
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RELATED ARTICLE: Angelina wants to adopt a baby from Burma to add to her 'rainbow' family The Daily Mail-UK, By Polly Dunbar, September 23, 2007
RELATED INTERVIEW & VIDEO: A Day in the Life of Brad Pitt: Lawmen Were to Jesse James What the Paparazzi Is to Pitt ABC News- Good Morning America, September 20, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: When we devalue marriage Capitol Hill Blue, By Betsy Hart, December 16, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: Why falling marriage rates are bad for the culture ScrippsNews, By Betsy Hart, October 26, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: Five non-religious arguments for marriage over living together TownHall.com, By Dennis Prager, Oct 3, 2006
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- Parenting Issues: Child Care Concerns Bother The Rich and The Poor TownHall.com, By Janice Shaw Crouse, September 18, 2007
There is a new wrinkle in the old argument about federally-funded universal child care. According to the National Association for Child Care Resource and Referral Agencies one in five (23 percent) women is delaying pregnancy or has decided against having a second or third child because she cannot afford day care costs. Even middle-class women, they claim, are struggling to afford child care while the mother works during the day. When polls cite "agonizing decisions" middle-class parents have to make and the "stark reality" that parents face, they don't mention the families who choose a boat, second car, larger house, big-screen television, expensive vacation or other luxury item instead of paying for quality child care or having the mother take a break from her career to nurture the family's children. Instead, the activists assume that the public ought to pay for an individual family's child care costs so that family, regardless of its income or spending priorities, can use its disposable income on some luxury item. The underlying premise is that no one should ever have to sacrifice in order to do whatever he or she wants to do. . . . . . Instead, we ought to be looking at getting fathers back into the home –– that is a proven way to provide stability and bright futures for children. The fact that single-mothers (many of them valiant, caring and conscientious) struggle to get it all done is not new information. They are the first ones to say that one person cannot possibly do it all when it comes to parenting. . . .
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- Maryland High Court Affirms Marriage: Constitutional amendment still needed to protect it from the Legislature CitizenLink.org, By Devon Williams, September 18, 2007
Maryland’s highest court today upheld a state law that defines marriage as the union of one man and one woman. Nine gay couples, who had been denied marriage licenses, filed suit with the help of the American Civil Liberties Union, claiming that Maryland’s law defining marriage as solely between one man and one woman was unconstitutional. A lower court overturned the law in 2006, saying it amounted to “sex discrimination” and violated the state's Equal Rights Amendment. But the Court of Appeals, the state's highest court, set the record straight in a split decision. Jenny Tyree, associate marriage analyst for Focus on the Family Action, called it a significant decision. “The Maryland court upheld two important ideas — that the marriage laws do not discriminate, and that procreation is a rational basis for the Legislature to protect marriage in the state," she said. “It's an especially heartening decision as we see evidence that children do best with a married mom and dad. This decision confirms that marriage is not a legal institution for the purpose of equality; it's a social institution with children at its heart." Today's ruling sends the matter back to the Legislature. . . . .
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- Canadians more accepting of interracial unions than Americans Canada.com, By Shannon Proudfoot- Canwest News Service, September 2007
Canadians - particularly those under 35 - are significantly more accepting of interracial marriage than Americans, according to a new report. While 77 per cent of Americans approved of marriage between blacks and whites in a recent Gallup poll, a report released today by University of Lethbridge sociologist Reginald Bibby shows that 92 per cent of Canadians are in favour of such unions. A similar proportion approve of intermarriage between other ethnic groups. The approval rating climbs to almost 99 per cent among those under age 35. . . . "We see ourselves as not just multicultural but really multi-everything," says Bibby. "Even if people don't necessarily agree with each other (or) don't explicitly approve of what people are thinking and doing, the Canadian way is to at least be willing to accept diversity." This mentality extends to opinions about same-sex marriage, abortion and legalizing marijuana, he says. His data comes from the Project Canada surveys he's conducted every five years since 1975, which form the core of his latest book, The Boomer Factor. Bibby says the differences go beyond attitudes to the way people actually live. Census data shows that 43 per cent of black Canadians who are married or living common-law have non-black partners, while just 10 per cent of African Americans are in the same situation. . . .
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- Pillow Talk BBC News, By Tom Geoghegan, September 18, 2007
Sex is talked about in the media more than ever before. But 50 years after a landmark report that pushed boundaries in public discourse on sex, what impact has this culture had on relationships? Has it bred a more honest approach between partners?. . . . . Modern society loves talking about sex. Newspapers, magazines and television chatshows have ensured public discussion on sex is now a solid fixture in the mainstream. On BBC Radio 4, a series of programmes devoted to sexuality in modern Britain is under way to mark the 50th anniversary of the Wolfenden report. The report in 1957 suggested that homosexual behaviour between consenting adults should no longer be a criminal offence, but it had a much wider impact by ushering in a new era of openness in discussing sexual behaviour. Fifty years later, there is a barrage of information. Its impact on young people and premarital sexual relations is often discussed, but what about married and cohabiting partners? Are they more likely to discuss their sexual preferences with each other, and does that make for a healthier relationship?. . . . . .
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- 'Marriage is a course I failed at'
From Judy Carne to Loni Anderson and Sally Field, the women in Mr. 'call me Burt' Reynolds' life play bigger roles than his kitschy celebrity might suggest Globa and Mail- CANADA, By Sarah Hampson, September 17, 2007
'I have tremendous regrets about things," Burt Reynolds says. "I could have done things gentler, better." The seventies star, whose first big hit was the 1972 movie Deliverance and whose moment of sex-symbol being was forever captured in the photograph of him, lounging nude on a bear rug, for the centerfold of Cosmopolitan magazine that same year, has placed his tinted aviator glasses on the table between us. For much of our conversation, he fixes his gaze on the middle distance. "Gentler?" I inquire, curious about his choice in words. He now turns to look directly at me. "Gentler, yes," he says. "With relationships and whatever.". . . . .The mustache is part of the 71-year-old's brittle stuck-in-time exterior that has been helped, or rather stitched in place, by some obvious plastic surgery. Which is why the soft interior that Mr. Reynolds readily puts on display is a surprise. "Marriage is a course I failed at," he says with a laugh, when asked if he would ever make the commitment again. He has been married twice: for two years in the mid-sixties to comedian Judy Carne, a star on Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In, and later (from 1988 until 1995) to actress Loni Anderson. "I passed up some incredible, wonderful women," he continues. By not marrying them? "Yeah, and I think that probably I would still be married if I'd married some of them.". . . . . "But I guess Sally [Field] was the one, if I had to name the woman who really stole my heart.". . . . .
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- Couple divorce after online 'affair' Ananova.com, September 17, 2007
A Bosnian couple are getting divorced after finding out they had been secretly chatting each other up online under fake names. Sana Klaric, 27, and husband Adnan, 32, from Zenica, poured out their hearts to each other over their marriage troubles, and both felt they had found their real soul mate.The couple met on an online chat forum while he was at work and she in an internet cafe, and started chatting under the names Sweetie and Prince of Joy. They eventually decided to meet up - but there was no happy ending when they realised what had happened. Now they are both filing for divorce - with each accusing the other of being unfaithful. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: A Hollywood Ending? FamilyLife.com, By Dave Boehi, October 15, 2007
RELATED BLOG: Couple Divorce After Having an Online Affair... With Each Other News Bloggers, Posted by Ben Greenman, September 18, 2007
RELATED BLOG: When Do Couples Fall Out of Love? News Bloggers, Posted by The Young Turks, September 18, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Online Activity Used in Divorce Court Switched.com, Posted by Joshua Fruhlinger, September 18, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Tell-All PCs and Phones Transforming Divorce New York Times, By Brad Stone, September 15, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Is This Man Cheating on His Wife? Wall Street Journal, By Alexandra Alter, August 10, 2007
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- A perfect disaster
Jennifer Niesslein sought to create the perfect life by reading every self-help book she could find and putting their ideas into practice. Did it work? Times Online- UK, By Carol Midgley, September 17, 2007
Jennifer Niesslein would never for a moment have claimed to be unhappy with her life. She had a husband and son whom she dearly loved, a detached suburban home, two dogs and an enviable job: she knew she was luckier than most and she was grateful. And yet something niggled. She wasn’t sad but, to use her words, she wasn’t “super-happy” either. For most of the time she felt mildly harried, her emotional state “just on the positive side of neutral”. The sum of the parts of her life should have added up to more joy. But instead she felt in a permanent state of mild distractedness. The house was a mess; she needed to lose a few pounds; she wasn’t getting enough quality time with her husband; why did she let petty things annoy her? It is a feeling many of us will recognise: a vague sense that we are failing to make the most of our existence, that if we could just strive to be slimmer, more giving, have nicer curtains, be more disciplined and perhaps live a bit more like the people we see in the airbrushed pages of OK! magazine, life would somehow be better. Perhaps it is a malaise of those who have their basic needs more than adequately met – those for whom, as Niesslein says, “happiness is the final frontier”. So she decided to do something about it; she decided to try to create the “perfect life”. . . . . .But midway through the project she began to have panic attacks. She started to sleepwalk again for the first time in years. Niesslein is not a fragile creature but she now thinks too much introspection and self-indulgent navel-gazing can affect self-esteem and mess with your mind. She charts her journey through the world of self help in a book, Practically Perfect in Every Way. Its closing words, meant ironically, are: “But enough about me.” “It is a very American idea that you can keep striving and striving and get better and better and better and do it all by yourself by just pulling up your bootstraps. But that doesn’t mean it’s true,” she says.. . . .
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- Parenting Issues: Fury as 12-year-old 'model' fronts world fashion show The Daily Mail- UK, September 17, 2007
A 12-year-old has caused a media frenzy after she was chosen to front one of the world's largest fashion shows. Blonde-haired, blue-eyed Maddison Gabriel was picked as the official ambassador of Gold Coast Fashion Week in Australia and has also worn a number of revealing outfits for the Queensland event. The country's Prime Minister John Howard strongly criticised the decision saying it was unacceptable. He said: "Catapulting girls as young as 12 into something like that is outrageous." Mr Howard wants Australia to follow the example of Europe and ban models younger than 16 appearing on catwalks. "There should be age limits, I mean there has to be, we do have to preserve some notion of innocence in our society," he said. But the 5ft 7ins youngster, who turned 13 yesterday, believed she deserved to win the modelling competition to become the 'face' of the show. . . . . Her mother Michelle Gabriel has defended her child's right to model and demanded an apology from the Prime Minister. "I believe the Prime Minister is getting very doddery," she said. "He does not know exactly what 13 and 14-year-old girls are like. I used to vote for him. We're trying to get our teenage daughters to act older. I am so happy that I've got a daughter who has got a good head on her shoulders.". . . . .
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