'MARRIAGE' NEWS- August 2007: The REAL Proposal For Marriage magazine

"Marriage In The News" is not a representation of The Real Proposal magazine...

The news articles and features presented below are simply an indication of how topical, controversial, and all-encompassing the issues surrounding marriage are throughout our society--and the world-- today. Some of the views and opinions expressed, and their respective web sites, do NOT reflect the views or opinions of The Real Proposal™ magazine. Many are highlighted largely to reiterate that the alarming statistical trends on the chaotic state of "Marriage" and "Family"--outlined in "A Mere Glimpse"--will continue unabated without a fundamental grasp and purposeful dissemination of TRUTH on the issues.

There are STILL three people in this marriage

There are STILL three people in this marriage The Daily Mail-UK, By Amanda Platell, August 31, 2007
Looking back over the coverage of Princess Diana's death, reprinted by the Mail all this week, I was struck by one thing in particular: Prince Charles's reaction. You couldn't miss the shock that was etched into his careworn face; guilt, too, I suspect. But there was also a sense of relief that at last his battles were over. Once again, our future King's judgment could not have been more wrong. As this week has shown, the old battles are still raging as fiercely as ever. So what would Diana herself have made of the controversy surrounding yesterday's memorial?. . . . . Diana was no saint. She wasn't above a spot of revenge. That's one of the reasons so many of us identified with her - especially women. Does anyone seriously believe that Diana would be sad to think of Charles stamping his petulant little feet at the humiliation of his beloved Camilla? Not after the very public humiliation he subjected his young wife to. . . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Camilla's hair goes white ... Is it because of the 'third person' in HER marriage? The Daily Mail- UK, By Geoffrey Levy and Richard Kay, October 12, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Diana: 'Our guardian, friend and protector - quite simply the best mother in the world' The Daily Mail- UK, By Rebecca English and Paul Harris, September 1, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: By Charles's side, only an empty seat The Daily Mail-UK, By Rebecca English, August 31, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Princess Diana's Life and Legacy: Author of 'The Diana Chronicles' Calls Her 'The Greatest Thing to Happen to the Monarchy Since Queen Victoria' ABC News, By Cynthia McFadden and Melinda Arons, August 29, 2007
READ AN EXCERPT: 'The Diana Chronicles' By Tina Brown
RELATED ARTICLE: Ten years on, Prince Charles has found happiness with Camilla AFP, August 27, 2007

What Does Open Marriage Look Like to You? Feministing, Contributed by Jenny Block, author of Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage
If there were no Disney, would girls still spend their lives looking for Prince Charming? I read fashion magazines. I figure I better confess that up front. As I flip through the pages of the September issue of W, I am reminded of just how airbrushed that universe is, and how brainwashed a readership it leaves in its wake. If I’d never looked at those pictures, I wonder how I’d think I “should” look. By extension, I wonder if other people would care so much that my relationships---and most especially my marriage---don’t look like they “should.” What would my world look like today, I wonder, if I hadn’t grown up with the messaging that it was essential to find my Prince Charming and live Happily Ever After? . . . . . . People who read my article in Tango magazine, “Portrait of an Open Marriage,” had strong opinions about my choices---and my husband’s---but most people aren’t so willing to look at their own. For the past few months I’ve been working on my new book project, Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage, and I keep wondering why I don’t know more people in open marriages who aren’t part of the out poly community. . . . . .

What Does Open Marriage Look Like to You?

Renee Zellweger targets Sir Paul in her desperate hunt for a husband The Daily Mail-UK, By Alison Bowyer, August 31, 2007
She's nearing 40, desperate to start a family - and flirting wildly with Paul McCartney. But Renee Zellweger's rush to find a husband has put her on collision course with a dangerous rival. . . . . . Her summer vacation, she has told friends, will not be complete until she bags herself a suitable singleton. No wonder, then, given her avowed intent to snag Mr Right, that all eyes were on her fragile frame (her doll-like figure drew as many gasps of concern as admiration among the glitzy event's weight-obsessed females) as she set her sights on a likely target. That the object of her rather too eager attention should be none other than the newly single - and eminently eligible - Sir Paul McCartney has understandably made her the subject of the gossip du jour in the clapperboard salons of this upmarket seaside resort. At the same time, however, the Bridget Jones star is said to have incurred the not inconsiderable wrath of a worthy - and equally glamorous - adversary. Onlookers at the Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers gig last Saturday say the 38-year-old Miss Zellweger's deeply flirtatious tete-a-tete with the former Beatle drew dagger looks from the ice blonde figure of one-time supermodel Christie Brinkley. The 53-year-old (and still stunning) former wife of singer Billy Joel is said to be furious that her younger rival has strayed on to territory where she has very much, or so she thought, planted her own flag. . . .

Demi Moore plays bodyguard while Ashton films 'What happens in Vegas' with stunning Cameron

Demi Moore plays bodyguard while Ashton films with stunning Cameron The Daily Mail-UK, By Donna McConnell, August 30, 2007
Hollywood marriages are notoriously fickle, and who can blame Demi Moore for feeling a little insecure as husband Ashton Kutcher filmed scenes with single blonde beauty Cameron Diaz. The actress looked a million dollars in a tight turquoise shift dress paired with killer heels, and stockings as she and Kutcher, chatted between takes on the pair's new movie 'What Happens in Vegas'. The premise of the film takes it cue from the saying common at hen and stag parties in the US, "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas". And with many an extra-curricular relationship started on film sets - just ask Jennifer Aniston - it's no wonder Demi breezed onto the set in New York to collect her man for some quality time. Not that Demi, 44 has anything to worry about, as the mother-of-three is clearly in great shape. . . . But with a husband 15 years younger, it's little wonder Demi is said to be sensitive about her age, which has prompted her to reportedly spend thousands on plastic surgery. . . . .

UK: Divorce rate drops to 30-year low as couples decide marriage is for life The Daily Mail-Uk, By Steve Doughty, August 30, 2007
Divorce rates fell to their lowest level in more than two decades last year amid growing signs that more married couples believe their commitment should be for life. The share of those who ended their marriages dropped dramatically for a second year running, according to official figures released today. The fall in divorce rates comes against a background of the plummeting popularity of marriage itself. Far fewer people are now choosing to tie the knot and the number of married people in the country has fallen to around half the population. Experts clashed over the reasons for the decline in divorce, with some lawyers pointing to the influence of highly-publicised big-money divorce settlements. But some analysts suggested that the simple decline in the numbers marrying was affecting divorce levels. The figures from the Office for National Statistics show that 12.2 of every 1,000 married people in England and Wales were divorced last year, a fall of seven per cent on the 2005 rate of 13.1. It was the lowest divorce rate since 1984. . . . . The 11.6 year average duration of a marriage compares with an average period of three years before a cohabitation breaks up or the couple marry. . . .

UK: Divorce rate drops to 30-year low as couples decide marriage is for life

Judge strikes down Iowa's same-sex marriage law

Judge strikes down Iowa's same-sex marriage law The Chicago Tribune, By Daid Pitt, August 30, 2007
DES MOINES, Iowa - A Polk County judge on Thursday struck down Iowa's law banning gay marriage. The ruling by Judge Robert Hanson concluded that the state's prohibition on same-sex marriage is unconstitutional and he ordered the Polk County recorder to issue marriage licenses to six gay couples. . . . . County Attorney John Sarcone said the county would immediately seek a stay from Hanson, which if granted would prevent anyone from seeking a marriage license until an appeal could be heard. The case will be appealed to the Iowa Supreme Court, which could refer it to the Iowa Court of Appeals, consider the case itself or decide not to hear the case. . . . . The judge said the state law banning same-sex marriage must be nullified, severed and stricken from the books and the marriage laws "must be read and applied in a gender neutral manner so as to permit same-sex couples to enter into a civil marriage..." State Sen. Ron Wieck, R-Sioux City, said he was surprised by the ruling and promised the Legislature would take another look at the issue. "We'll look at something we can do legislatively," Wieck said. House Minority Leader Christopher Rants, R-Sioux City, said the judge's ruling only illustrates the need for a state constitutional amendment banning gay marriage. . . .

'The Nest' Mag: The Horror of "The Marrieds" Gawker.com, Posted by Doree, August 29, 2007
The other day, a magazine arrived addressed to a former occupant of my apartment. It was a copy of The Nest magazine, which is published by theknot.com. The thinking seems to be that women go to theknot.com and buy The Knot magazine to prepare for their weddings, and then once they're married, they move on to The Nest. If there was ever a reason to want to avoid becoming a "married," as they refer to themselves, this would be it. First of all, they seem to be this secret little club that they're all so psyched and relieved to have joined! Ew. Also, it's totally this, like, "how do I get my DH [dear husband; they use the most idiotic acronyms for everything—more on that later] to wash the dishes, I don't want to feel like a nag?". . . . . . In the "life" section there's a couple pages about pregnancy. Just to, you know, prime the pump, we suppose! Including a "message board slang decoder," so when you're trolling UrbanBaby or whatever you'll know that BD means "baby dance" which means SEX. OMG SEX. SEX SEX SEX. Seriously, they can't say the word "sex"? Also SH means "stupid/silly husband." It's like every stereotype about relations between men and women was codified by a bunch of women at a Tupperware party in South Orange in 1957. . . . .

'The Nest' Mag: The Horror of The Marrieds

Essay: Bionormativity and the Construction of Parenthood Georgia Law Review (Forthcoming) By Katharine K. Baker
Abstract:
This piece explores the relationship between legal and biological parenthood. It examines how neither history, nor evolutionary biology nor moral philosophy dictate a legal regime in which parenthood must be based on biological connection, but that attraction to a biological (or "bionormative") regime remains strong. In explaining why, it suggests that much of what attracts people to bionormativity is not biology itself, but the way in which a biological regime constructs parenthood as a private, exclusive and binary enterprise. It is these ancillary qualities of bionormativity that people may care the most about. Today, a variety of forces put pressure on these ancillary qualities of bionormativity. The extent of child poverty, the rejection of (even the appearance of) monogamy and the use of donated gametes all, in different ways, bring into question the extent to which we may want parenthood to stay private, exclusive, binary and biological. The analysis presented here suggests that what is most destabilizing to a bionormative regime is not direct manipulation of biological material, but the fluid living patterns of contemporary adults. Because contemporary adult relationships are less likely to be permanently binary and exclusive, so is parenthood. When parenthood becomes less binary and exclusive, it becomes less private and less biological as well. The analysis presented also reveals that a construction of parenthood that is more public, more inclusive, less binary and less biological is a construction of hierarchical parenthood, or a parental regime in which some parents have substantially more parental rights and responsibilities than others. Recognizing degrees of parenthood may be an inevitable byproduct of a system that rejects bionormativity. . . . .

A grim-faced Craig, whose wife, Suzanne, stood silently by his side at the news conference, appeared defiant with respect to the charges against him

Craig: I'm Not Gay, Did Nothing Wrong
Idaho Republican Says He Was Hounded by Newspaper, Guilty Plea Was Mistake ABC News, By Marcus Baram, Emily Friedman, and Z. Byron Wolf, Aug. 28, 2007
Sen. Larry Craig, R-Idaho, strongly asserted this afternoon that he is not gay and that his decision to plead guilty to disorderly conduct in a public men's room was a mistake. The conservative senator was arrested in June on charges of lewd and disorderly conduct in a men's restroom at the Minneapolis, Minn., airport. "Let me be clear, I am not gay. I never have been gay," Craig told reporters in Boise, Idaho. . . . ."I did nothing wrong at the Minneapolis airport. I regret my decision to plead guilty and the sadness that decision has brought to my wife, family, friends, staff and fellow Idahoans. For that I apologize," he said. "In June, I overreacted and made a poor decision. While I was not involved in any inappropriate conduct at the Minneapolis airport or anywhere else, I chose to plead guilty to a lesser charge in the hope of making it go away. I did not seek any counsel, either from an attorney, staff, friends or family. That was a mistake, and I deeply regret it. . . . .

Paula's Affair Shock New York Post, By Dareh Gregorian, August 28, 2007
Paula Zahn's teed-off hubby didn't know that steamy sex trysts between his wife and an old pal were par for the course for years. Maybe he should have. The illicit, years-long love affair between Zahn and business big Paul Fribourg was sizzling even as Fribourg hit the golf links with Zahn's real-estate magnate husband, Richard Cohen, sources told The Post yesterday. yesterday. "Richard feels betrayed," one pal said - and he only found out the truth from a tell-all manuscript Zahn wrote that documents her relationship with ContiGroup CEO Fribourg. "It's a lurid and shocking handwritten account of their relationship," said the friend, who asked not to be identified. Sources declined to discuss any details of Zahn's "love book" or where exactly it was found, except to say, "She was indiscreet.". . . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Oh, Leave Me Out of This Mess- Paula Zahn Rival Keeps Cool New York Post, By Jennifer Fermino, August 29, 2007

Of Mice and Mormons (Five Parts) TownHall.com, By Mike S. Adams, August 27, 2007
Once upon a time, there was a man named Darwin West who decided to enroll in the master's degree program at Purdue University Calumet so he could study Marriage and Family Therapy. Because he was a member of the LDS Church he subscribed to its belief that sex is to be confined to marriage, which is a lifetime commitment between one man and one woman. The year after he enrolled in the master's program, Mr. West worked for LDS Family Services. This was to fulfill some of the practicum hours required for the master's program. At least three other students in the program had worked for LDS Family Services before Mr. West. All were allowed to count their hours toward the practicum requirement. During Mr. West's first year at Purdue, no faculty member ever raised any concerns about his academic performance. No one expressed concerns over his ability to relate to other classmates or potential clients. He had a good year. But, then, the next summer, one Professor Trepper agreed to meet with the director of LDS Family Services. This was so they could formalize the relationship with the master's program so it would be an officially recognized training site for students. But, alas, the meeting never occurred. Later on that summer, Mr. West met with a young male who sought counseling from LDS Family Services. The teenager felt attracted to other men and wanted help so he could overcome those desires. . . . Mr. West did not hear anything more about being kicked out of the program that year. He continued earning straight "A"s and thinking all was well. But things were not well. Things were not well at all. . . . .

Bishop Thomas W. Weeks III is charged with aggravated assault and making terroristic threats against his wife, Prophetess Juanita Bynum, and some of her fans are being taught a lesson about fairy tales, some say.

For 'prophetess' of true romance, marriage a mess The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, By Rosalind Bently, August 26, 2007
With each sheet she wrapped around her body that day, the crowd roared for "Prophetess" Juanita Bynum. At the singles' conference, sponsored by fellow evangelist T.D. Jakes, Bynum spoke to her audience in plain, smoky-nightclub language about her battle with the flesh and her longing for a husband. The bedsheets represented all the empty sex she'd had with men. "Why am I not married?" she cried. "But I find it very difficult to listen to anybody preach to me about being single when they got a pair of thighs in [their] bed every night ... and you keep telling me to 'Hold on, honey, stay there by yourself' ... and you goin' home to big old muscles and thighs? ... I wanna hear 'hold on' from somebody that knows my struggle!" Her sermon that day in 1997 culminated with what she said was a dropping of the sheets, signaling that she was repentant, done with premarital sex and ready for a man delivered by none other than the Holy Ghost. "I don't wanna be disillusioned, I want a man of God, a praying man ... a man that loves his mama and respects his sisters. ... Say 'Yeah!' " she hollered. The predominantly female audience hollered back. . . . .

Fallen Pastor Seeks Financial Support The Atlanta Journal-Constitution- AP, August 25, 2007
— The Rev. Ted Haggard, who left the megachurch he founded after admitting to "sexual immorality," has asked supporters for financial assistance while he and his wife pursue their studies. The former New Life Church pastor plans to seek a master's degree in counseling at the University of Phoenix while his wife studies psychology, he said in an e-mail sent this week to KRDO-TV in Colorado Springs. The couple and two of their sons planned to move Oct. 1 to the Phoenix Dream Center, a faith-based halfway house in Phoenix, where Haggard and his wife would provide counseling, the e-mail said. . . . Haggard left the 10,000-member New Life Church late last year and resigned as head of the National Association of Evangelicals after a former male escort accused Haggard of paying him for sex. . . .

Fallen Pastor Ted Haggard Seeks Financial Support

Bloodied and bruised Amy Winehouse stands by husband who 'saved her life'

Bloodied and bruised Amy Winehouse stands by husband who 'saved her life' The Daily Mail-UK, August 24, 2007
Singer Amy Winehouse has defended her husband in a series of texts after the couple were involved in a violent row which left them both bloodied and bruised. Amy denied Blake was the cause of the argument, 24 hours earlier after which the 23-year-old singer, who has spent most of the summer in and out of rehab for crack and heroin addiction, was seen with bandages covering her arm, blood-spattered shoes and a gashed knee. And in a series of texts between the Rehab singer and celebrity blogger Perez Hilton, she defended her husband who she claimed "saved my life". Amy told Perez: "Blake is the best man in the world. We would never ever harm each other... I was cutting myself after he found me in our room about to do drugs with a call girl and rightly said I wasn't good enough for him. I lost it and he saved my life.". . . . . Miss Winehouse, who has a history of self-harming, had asked for medical assistance to patch up cuts on her arm. At around 2.30am, said guests, the fight sounded like it had restarted - then Miss Winehouse was seen sprinting down the corridor to the lift, pursued by her badly bleeding husband. One guest who got into the lift to reception at the same time said they started shouting at each other. "Amy was in floods of tears. This guy was screaming at her. . . . .

The explosive rethinking of sex reassignment The Globe and Mail- CANADA, By Margaret Wente, August 24, 2007
. . . . In the prevailing narrative, people like Roy are essentially women trapped in the bodies of men. But there is another theory, one that's deeply unpopular, to say the least. It holds that they are really men with an unusual psychological quirk: a male deviation called autogynephilia. This theory is largely based on research studies conducted at Toronto's Clarke Institute during the 1980s and 90s. It found that some men who seek sex changes are driven mainly by an intense erotic fascination with dressing up as women. The researchers found that as they get older, these men (predominantly heterosexual) become increasingly eager to add more realism to their presentations through surgery. As women, they rhapsodize about being able to express their natural inclinations for shopping, makeup, domesticity and gentleness. But in other ways, they aren't womanly at all. They aren't interested in babies and children. And, like Deborah, they still find women sexually attractive. After their transition, they see themselves as lesbians. . . . . It's obvious why this theory is so inflammatory. It challenges the foundation of transgender identity politics. It implies that people like Deborah need therapy, not surgery. Paul McHugh, a psychiatrist at Johns Hopkins University, goes further. He believes that all the social, medical and psychiatric resources employed in turning men into women are “a misdirection of psychiatry.” He is even more reviled than Dr. Bailey. . . . . . . Partly at the urging of Dr. McHugh, Johns Hopkins no longer performs sex reassignment surgery. “I concluded,” he wrote, “that to provide a surgical alteration to the body of these unfortunate people was to collaborate with a mental disorder rather than to treat it.”. . . . .

RELATED ARTICLE & VIDEO: Freeing Up Deborah- Part 2 The Boston Globe, By Neil Swidey, August 19, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE & VIDEO: A Family Doctor's Journey From Man to Woman And what it means for his family of patients- Part 1 The Boston Globe, By Neil Swidey, August 12, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Two Brothers Share How They Coped With Their Dad's Decision To Become A Woman ST. PETERSBURG TIMES, By Lane DeGregory, May 1, 2007

Without Walls Founders Divorcing MSNBC.com, By Michelle Bearden and Baird Helgeson- The Tampa Tribune, August 23, 2007
- Randy and Paula White, the founders and co-pastors of what has been one of the nation's biggest and fastest-growing churches, plan to divorce. Members of Without Walls International Church reacted with tears and a chorus of "Oh, no's" after the Whites' announcement at Thursday night's service. Randy called Paula to the podium about an hour into the service. He was somber; Paula appeared choked up. "It's the most difficult decision I've ever had to make in my entire life," he told the congregation, describing Paula as an exceptional woman, mother and preacher. She pledged to return frequently to preach. Viewers who tuned in to a live webcast of the service missed the announcement; the video and audio were cut off for about 10 minutes. . . . The Whites, who've been married nearly 18 years, said in interviews that the split is amicable and comes after visits to counselors over several years. They blame two lives going in different directions. Randy, however, said he takes "100 percent responsibility" for the breakup. . . . . An Australian-born businessman, Clarke said he's given hundreds of thousands of dollars to the church since it was founded by the Whites in 1991 as the South Tampa Christian Center. He partially blamed the couple's breakup on their devotion to preaching a prosperity message, exhorting followers to give more money to the church in order to be blessed with greater wealth. "Too many ministries have become big business. . . .

Without Walls Church International Founders, Paula and Randy White, tell worshippers that they are divorcing at Thursday night's service.

RELATED ARTICLE: Are Mega-Preachers Scandal-Prone?   Time Magazine, By David Van Biema, September 28, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Without Walls Church Finally Delivers On Promise Of Home   By Baird Helgeson and Michelle Bearden- The Tampa Tribune, August 16, 2007

RELATED FORUM:  Forum: How much government oversight, if any, should church finances get?   TBO.com, Posted June 29, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Housing Agency Orders Neighborhood Clinic Closed   TBO.com, By John W. Allman- The Tampa Tribune, June 27, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Church Addresses Dispute   TBO.com, By Baird Helgeson and Michelle Bearden- The Tampa Tribune, June 15, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Without Walls Responds to Tribune Articles    TBO.com, June 14, 2007

RELATED FORUM: Forum: Without Walls TBO.com, Posted June 12, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Widow: Pastors Reneged On Deal To Care For Me TBO.com, By Michelle Bearden and Baird Helgeson- The Tampa Tribune, May 27, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Dream Home Win Proves Too Good To Be True   Forgotten Word Ministries, By Michelle Bearden and Baird Helgeson-The Tampa Tribune, May 25, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Of Faith, Fame & Fortune TBO.com-Tampa Bay, By Michelle Bearden and Baird Helgeson, May 20, 2007

RELATED VIDEO: Video: Interview With Randy And Paula White

RELATED PHOTOS: Without Walls Photo Gallery

RELATED ARTICLE: Read The Audit Paula White Ministries.org

Televangelist Juanita Bynum assaulted by estranged husband Bishop Thomas W. Weeks III

Televangelist Assaulted in Atlanta AOL NEWS- AP, August 23, 2007
- Police said Juanita Bynum, a televangelist who has won a national following with sermons about women's empowerment, was assaulted by her preacher husband in the parking lot of an Atlanta hotel early Wednesday. Bynum and her estranged husband, Thomas W. Weeks III, the founder of Global Destiny churches, met at Renaissance Concourse Hotel near Atlanta's airport to try to reconcile, police said. About 4 a.m., they fought in the parking lot until a hotel bellman pulled Weeks off, Officer Ronald Campbell said. "She was bruised up and battered," Campbell said. "She had purple bruising around her neck and upper torso." No charges had been filed by Wednesday night against Weeks, who left the scene according to police. . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Bynum's Husband Charged in Assault 11Alive.com August 23, 2007
RELATED ARTICLE: Holy War! When Televangelists Attack! TMZ.com, Posted by TMZ Staff, August 23, 2007

RELATED SITE: Juanita Bynum MySpace

RELATED ARTICLE:  AUSTRAILIA: Pastor had sex with daughters The Sydney Morning Herald, August 30, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Pastor slain by husband, police say Boston Globe, By David Abel- Globe Staff, June 12, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE:   Slain Pastor's Wife: 'My Ugly Came Out' Crime Library- Court TV, April 16, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: 10 Ways to Lift Yourself Up When a Spiritual Leader Lets You Down   Beliefnet.com- NY, By Valerie Reiss, Nov 9, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Signs of a Restorable Spirit: What are the tangible evidences of repentance? Christianity Today, Posted by Marshall Shelley, Nov 8, 2006

Modern Girls and the Modesty Movement National Public Radio, August 23, 2007
There's a growing modesty movement among girls. The modern and modest clothing line is just one example. But skeptics wonder, why do we push boys toward adventure, but tell girls to cover up? Amy Dickinson, "Ask Amy" columnist for the Chicago Tribune, and Wendy Shalit, author of Girls Gone Mild talk about the new "modesty movement."

LISTEN TO: Talk of the Nation National Public Radio, August 23, 2007

RELATED BOOK EXCERPT: 'Girls Gone Mild' Chapter One, By Wendy Shalit

RELATED ARTICLE: I’m single, I’m sexy, and I’m only 13: Teenage girls are strutting their stuff in the revealing styles of their pop idols. But such rampant sexualisation is taking its toll on their mental health Times Online- UK, July 28, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Girls Gone Mild TownHall.com, By Mona Charen, July 27, 2007

'Girls Gone Mild' Author Wendy Shalit discusses Modern Girls and the Modesty Movement with Chicago Tribune columnist Amy Dickinson, author of the Ask Amy syndicated column

Will a $150 Fine Prod Folks to Pull Their Pants Up? Visit Mansfield, Louisiana and Find Out

Will a $150 Fine Prod Folks to Pull Their Pants Up? Visit Mansfield, Louisiana and Find Out Black America Web, By Gregory Kane, August 23, 2007
In about three weeks, the new law in Mansfield, La., will be “pull ‘em up or pay up.” At long last, there is finally a backlash against the pants-sagging-down-over-the-butt look, popularized among American youth for the past 15 to 20 years. Starting Sept. 15, anyone walking around Mansfield with his pants hanging down over his butt showing his drawers will be fined $150 plus court costs. Offenders could land in jail for as many as 15 days. And make that “pants hanging down over his or her butt.” The law applies to the fairer sex as well. . . . . For years, I heard that it came out of the prisons, that black youth copied the “fashion” from guys in lockdown who had to wear their pants sagging over their butts because they weren’t allowed to have belts. But the week this law was passed, I heard another version of how the trend started. . . . .

Beyond Foster Care: States Extend Help to 18-Year-Olds Facing Bleak Futures on Their Own Pew Research Center, By Christine Vestal- Stateline.org Staff Writer, August 23, 2007
In most states, youths in foster care are on their own when they turn 18. That's because federal funding for payments to foster parents and group homes is cut off when foster kids reach 18, leaving those who have not been adopted or returned to their families to fend for themselves, with little state support. Two states are footing the bill to help foster-care youths who turn 18. Vermont this year became the second state, after Illinois, to use state money to extend its foster-care services to age 21, if a youth chooses to remain in the program. While other states have adopted programs to help youths who are "emancipated" from foster care without permanent homes, states say their options are limited without federal funding. For those living in group homes, "kick out" happens within days of their 18th birthday, explained Robin Nixon of the National Foster Care Coalition, an advocacy group for children. "They sometimes end up sitting on a curb with their belongings in a black trash bag and nowhere to go," she said. . . . .

Former foster teen Lisa Dickson was honored to be chosen as one of the chapter designees for Foster Care Alumni of America. She discusses her experiences in foster care in an upcoming memoir, titled Sunshine Girl on a Rainy Day

Sexed-up seniors do it more than you'd think

Sexed-up seniors do it more than you'd think
Unprecedented U.S. survey finds older people lead steamy private lives MSNBC.com- AP, August 22, 2007
An unprecedented study of sex and seniors finds that many older people are surprisingly frisky - willing to do, and talk about, intimate acts that would make their grandchildren blush. That may be too much information for some folks. But it comes from the most comprehensive sex survey ever done among 57- to 85-year-olds in the United States. Sex and interest in it do fall off when people are in their 70s, but more than a quarter of those up to age 85 reported having sex in the previous year. And the drop-off has a lot to do with health or lack of a partner, especially for women, the survey found. The federally funded study, one by respected scientists and published in Thursday's New England Journal of Medicine, overturns some stereotypical notions that physical pleasure is just a young person's game. . . . . The survey involved two-hour face-to-face interviews with 3,005 men and women around the country. Researchers also took blood, saliva and other samples that will tell about hormone levels, sex-related infections and other health issues in future reports. They even tested how well seniors could see, taste, hear and smell - things that affect being able to have and enjoy sex. Some results:. . . . .

Boys, don't be jealous of her toys — play along!
How's a guy to compete with the wonders of electronics engineering? NBC.com, By Brian Alexander, August 16, 2007
About a year ago, I attended a sex toy exposition where manufacturers of “novelties” displayed their wares, hoping to entice retailers to buy boxes and boxes of mechanical satisfaction. Walking around the display halls, I realized that it is impossible for a man to feel good about himself when confronted with a few thousand wall-mounted penis replicas that look as if they had been exposed to radiation at a Nevada test site. A zucchini of such dimensions would win blue ribbons at every county fair. Not only were these contraptions enormous, but they buzzed and rotated, and some were even computer programmable to create a sort of vibrating symphony. I imagined women coming home with these things and their men whining, “It’s not fair! I don’t have a motor!” Can you blame us? In case you have been living in some undisclosed location, men now have a set of body insecurities — abs, hair, biceps, rear, teeth — that parallel the ones with which women have long been blessed. And now we have to compete with battery-operated boyfriends. Is it too skinny, too curved, too short? Does it look like Curly from the Three Stooges? Does the helmet remind you of Darth Vader? And we’re not even to the part about how well it works. (“The force is strong with this one.”) Battling envy. . . . . Chiropractors all over the country are just waiting for us to sprain something trying to contort ourselves into just the right positions to hit all the buttons during intercourse. But Davidson argues that sex toys can help us to be in two places at once. Better, she says, to see a sex toy “as an assistant rather than competition.” The device can be buzzing away while he is busy kissing and touching her, pretending to be the appliance repairman. . . . .

Boys, don't be jealous of her toys- play along...

Stanley Reimer, 51, allegedly threw his seriously ill wife four stories to her death because he could no longer afford to pay for her medical care.

Man Allegedly Throws Wife From Balcony AOL News-AP, August 17, 2007
KANSAS CITY, Mo. - A man threw his seriously ill wife four stories to her death because he could no longer afford to pay for her medical care, prosecutors said in charging him with second-degree murder. According to court documents filed Wednesday in Jackson County Circuit Court, Stanley Reimer walked his wife to the balcony of their apartment and kissed her before throwing her over. . . . Stanley Reimer, 51, was charged Wednesday. He remained jailed on $250,000 bond and was scheduled to be arraigned Thursday. In the probable cause statement filed with the charges, police said Reimer was desperate because he could not pay the bills for his wife's treatment for neurological problems and uterine cancer. . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Jonathan Kay on the latest American health-care martyr: 'I guarantee the name Criste Reimer will soon be famous' National Post, Posted by Jonathan Kay, August 16, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: A Tragedy in Kansas City: Criste Reimer CrimeBlog.US
In 1998 a woman felt moved to write a message in an online guestbook. The guestbook was attached to a site telling the story of a man who lost his wife after a struggle with heart problems. The original site is no longer in existence, but the guestbook can still be read. The author of the message used the e-mail address cudlypoo@swbell.net. A portion of her message: . . .

Is Having an Online Wife Adultery? Switched.com, Posted by Joshua Frulinger, August 15, 2007
It's Sunday morning at 6AM, and Dutch Hoorenbeek rolls out of bed to check on his strip club and do some renovations to an outside party deck. He then fires several tenants in his mall for not paying rent, signs up four new ones, and transports to his office to spend some time with his wife, Tenaj Jackelope. The thing is, in real life, Dutch Hoorenbeek is actually Ric Hoogestraat, a call-center operator making $14 an hour. He's also married to Sue Hoogestraat, not Tenaj Jackelope. Confusing? It should be. Turns out that Ric and Sue's marriage is on the rocks. She contends that he spends more time online in Second Life, a virtual universe currently home to 30 million players, with his online wife. Sue spends her days in front of the television, while Ric is in the other room running a virtual night club and consorting with his online wife, sometimes for as long as 14 hours at a time on weekends. . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Is This Man Cheating on His Wife? Wall Street Journal, By Alexandra Alter, August 10, 2007
Alexandra Alter on the toll one man's virtual marriage is taking on his real one and what researchers are discovering about the surprising power of synthetic identity.

RELATED ARTICLE: 'Second Life' avatar sued over virtual sex device USA Today, August 10, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: 'Second Life' Sexual Genitalia Spawns Lawsuit Switched.com, Posted by Terrence O'Brien, August 14, 2007

Second Life Gamer Rick Hoogestraat spends up to 14 hours a day online as his alter ego, Dutch Hoorenbeek, who has a virtual wife

Want a recipe for a solid marriage? Mix the basics with lots of fun - and share the chores

Want a Recipe for a Solid Marriage? Mix the Basics with Lots of Fun - and Share the Chores Black America Web, By Joseph C. Phillips, Tuesday, August 14, 2007
On Monday, my wife and I celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary. In the large scheme of things, we are still relative novices. However, given the fact that of the couples we know that were married around the same year we were, we are one of three that are still together, it is apparently no small feat. I wish I could take the credit, but we have made it through, no thanks to me. I have bumbled my way through the last decade, and a half and it is only by the grace of God (and the fact that my wife thinks I’m a really good kisser) that we have managed this long. No, I have not been unfaithful or gambled away the mortgage payment. There are, of course, many other practices besides infidelity, drunkenness or irresponsibility that can be equally destructive. Often times, it is the little things: indifference, thoughtlessness or failing to help around the house that eat away at the fabric of a marriage. . . . . . Baby, you are the best friend, lover and partner a man could ask for. And I am humbled that you have honored me by agreeing to spend the rest of your life with me. . . .

Minister’s wife who killed husband released
Woman claimed spousal abuse, served 67 days in mental health facility
MSNBC.com- AP, August 14, 2007
- The woman convicted of manslaughter in the shotgun slaying of her minister husband was freed Tuesday after serving 67 days in custody. Mary Winkler was released from a mental health facility where she had been undergoing treatment for about two months, defense attorney Steve Farese Sr. said. He has declined to identify the facility where Winkler was held. Winkler, 33, was convicted of voluntary manslaughter in the 2006 shotgun slaying of her husband, Matthew, at the Church of Christ parsonage in Selmer, where the couple lived with their three young daughters. She was charged with first-degree murder, but jurors convicted her of the lesser charge after she testified that her husband abused her and demanded sex she considered unnatural. . .

Mary Winkler, the minister's wife who killed her husband has been released. She claimed spousal abuse, and served 67 days in mental health facility

Man Sues Florist for Revealing Affair MSNBC.com, Posted by Noah Oppenheim, August 13, 2007
Today we brought you what appears to be another Hall of Fame entry in the Annals of Insane Lawsuits. Leroy Greer, a car salesman, called 1-800-flowers.com and sent flowers to his girlfriend. 1-800-flowers.com subsequently sent a receipt to Leroy’s house. The trouble? Leroy shares his house with his wife, who thus discovered Leroy has a girlfriend. . . . . Upon hearing his story, most of us instinctually think Leroy’s a little nuts. He’s not exactly a sympathetic character, and it’s hard to imagine anyone being a “victim” because their extramarital affair was discovered. But in fairness to poor Leroy, 1-800-flowers.com does appear to have made a mistake. He explicitly asked them not to send anything to his home, and they assured him that wouldn’t happen. If his account is accurate, they proffered a service – discretely delivering flowers – and they failed to deliver. . . .

Women wedded to work and needing a wife at home International Herald Tribune, By Shira Boss, August 13, 2007
Now that women have solidly earned their place in the work force, many find themselves still yearning for something men often have: wives. "The thing I most want in life is a wife. I'm not kidding," said Joyce Lustbader, a research scientist at Columbia University, who has been married for 29 years. "I work all day, sometimes seven days a week, and still have to go home and make dinner and have all those things to do around the house." It is not just the extra shift at home that is a common complaint. Working women, whether married or single, also see their lack of devoted spousal support as an impediment to getting ahead in their careers, especially when they are competing against men who have wives behind them, whether those wives are working or staying at home. And research supports their argument: It appears that marriage, at least marriage with children, bolsters a man's career but hinders a woman's. . . . . In 1972, the first issue of Ms. Magazine included a now classic essay by Judy Syfers, "I Want a Wife." Her fantasies included her wife taking the children to the park and on play dates, arranging a social life, passing hors d'oeuvres to guests, planning meals, cooking, cleaning. The sentiment seems to persist among today's working women. . . . .

Women wedded to work and needing a wife at home

RELATED ARTICLE: Modern Marriage: "I Like Hugs. I Like Kisses. But What I Really Love is Help with the Dishes." Pew Research Center, July 18, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: "Desperate Feminist Wives": Does the Quest for Marital Equality Doom Marital Happiness?   FindLaw.com- By Joanna Grossman and Linda McClain, Apr 4, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE:  Desperate Feminist Wives: Why wanting equality makes women unhappy   Slate.com- By Meghan O'Rourke, Mar 6, 2006

RELATED STUDY: What's Love got to do with it? Equality, Equity, Commitment, and Women's Marital Quality By W. Bradford Wilcox, University of Virginia, Steven L. Nock, University of Virginia

RELATED ARTICLE: 'Happy' housewives finally get their due   USA Today, By Carol Memmott, Oct 19, 2005

RELATED ARTICLE: The artful dodge of housework Christian Science Monitor, By Marilyn Gardner, July 5, 2005

Can This Marriage Be Saved? New York Times, By Laurie Abraham, August 12, 2007
“You ask me for intimacy,” Marie was telling her husband of 22 years, Clem — and, unavoidably, the therapist and four other couples in the room — “the same way you ask if I’d like croutons on my salad.” She spoke slowly, deliberately, each word chipping out of her mouth like an ax striking wood. “I don’t hear the difference.” “I guess — ” Clem began. “I don’t hear the difference in the question.” More sharp chips; Marie would not be denied. Seated next to her husband, she had turned to confront him, though, as usual, she was holding a large pillow in her lap — between her and him, between her and the rest of the group. Light dappled the walls of the Jersey Shore office, reflected sun off the bay three stories below. . . . . . .This was the fourth session of a yearlong couples-therapy group led by a Philadelphia psychologist named Judith Coché, and it had already been established that among Clem’s major reasons for being here was the sexlessness of his marriage (once a month at best, though the couple would disagree about the frequency in a perversely predictable way: Clem, who missed it most, believed he’d had it the least, and vice versa). Resentment and anger, meanwhile, seeped from his wife, the mother of their two teenage daughters, which sounds like the oldest story of marital disenchantment in the book — and, to some extent, it is. . . .

Conservative activist Sandy Rios, runner-up for MSNBC Keith Olberman's Worst Person in the World Countdown award, speaks out

The Runner-up for "Worst Person in the World" Speaks Out TownHall.com, By Sandy Rios, August 9, 2007
"Please do us all a favor... get raped and then killed. You rancid, filthy ___." That's a direct quote from an e-mail I received after appearing on "The O'Reilly Factor." I was on the show objecting to the San Diego Padres celebration of "Gay Pride" on the same day they invited hundreds of children for a floppy hat giveaway. "You are a shameful disgrace and hate monger," penned another in response to my statement that homosexuality is an unhealthy, life-shortening lifestyle that should not be promoted by the Padres to children. For such "hate" I was named runner up for the "Worst Person in the World" by MSNBC's Keith Olberman. This kind of vulgarity, exaggeration and the not-so-veiled threats are nothing new to those of us who dare speak the truth to a world turned upside down. Homosexual activists have propagated their deceptive message so effectively that their own community tragically believes they cannot change, they have no choice—and that people who oppose their "choice" hate them. . . . If love is letting friends and family lead destructive lives while standing by, nodding in approval, then I choose not to "love." But I do choose to be a friend... a faithful friend... the one who speaks truth even at the risk of friendship and maybe, in this case, my reputation. . . .

Ruth and Billy Graham's Final Farewell Time magazine, By Nancy Gibbs and Michael Duffy, August 9, 2007
. . . . . We asked him how he was coping since her death in June. "I realize now," Graham replied, "in a way I never could have before, that a very important part of me has been taken away." And so he has a new tenderness for all those who mourn, that they will be comforted. . . . . . Graham has always been one to keep looking forward and not get stuck in the past. He's thinking about fixing up the house or writing another book — he has already written close to 30. "Over the years I've seen people lose a spouse and then withdraw and lose interest in life," he says, "and I believe we need to resist that." But it has become clear that a man who spent his life teaching people how to live is now in a position to show people how to die, with hope for an eternal kingdom that is no longer a theological abstraction to him. Heaven is where Ruth is. . . . .

J-Lo wins payout from ex-husband News.com.au, August 9, 2007
Hollywood diva Jennifer Lopez was awarded around $US545,000 ($638,000) after filing a lawsuit to stop her ex-husband from publishing a tell-all memoir of their marriage, court papers showed overnight. A Los Angeles arbitrator made the award after actress-singer Lopez, 38, sued former husband Ojani Noa for breach of contract, claiming that the book violated a previous agreement not to reveal details of their relationship. . . . Mr Noa was also ordered to hand over to the actress all copies of materials related to the book. "The book proposal clearly contains material that violates the terms referenced (in) ... the settlement agreement," the arbitrator said. Mr Noa's book, which has never been published, alleged that Lopez had multiple affairs, including one with her third and current husband, Marc Anthony, during their 11 month marriage that started in 1997, according to court papers. Lopez' lawsuit alleged Mr Noa had offered not to publish the book in exchange for $US5 million ($5.86 million). . . . .

J-Lo wins payout from ex-husband Ojani Noa, pictured here with her in happier times

There's a new Brad in town: ABC's McSteamy New Bachelor, Brad Womack

ABC's McSteamy New Bachelor E! Online, By Gina Serpe, August 9, 2007
There's a new Brad in town. ABC has announced that bar owner Brad Womack will be the 11th unlucky-in-love singleton to attempt to find a partner on The Bachelor, when the latest edition of the long-running matchmaking show kicks off next month. The network is touting Atlanta-born, Texas-raised Womack as a self-made entrepreneur, a drastic change from the pedigreed guys of years past. The 34-year-old blue-eyed Womack knows from manual labor, having left Texas State University after just one year to work for roughly eight years in oil fields around the country, logging time in Texas, Louisiana, North Dakota and California. Afterward, Womack set his sights on bartending and soon saved up enough money with twin brother Chad and other brother Wesley to open his own bar at the tender age of 28. The business-minded siblings have since opened four boîtes in total in the Austin area and are looking to venture into hotel development. And apparently love-life development. . . .

The Calculus of Sexual Experimentation TownHall.com, By Janice Shaw Crouse, August 9, 2007
. . .. . Sadly, the opponents of abstinence education don't want an equally tough approach to the realities of sexual activity. Their mantra is: "kids are going to experiment, so give them condoms." But given the unforgiving nature of a sexually transmitted disease such as genital herpes – once you get it, you've got it for life – not to mention some of the others like human papillomavirus (HPV) that increase the odds of cervical cancer, or the lengthy and unrelenting demands of taking care of an unplanned infant, I think it is only fair for the kids to know exactly what their odds are when they are given condoms and told "if you're going to do it, use protection.". . . . It is sad to think about how, for the sake of a little attention and maybe even a little affection, a lot of girls say "o.k." and then have to contend with the very real possibility of ending up pregnant or infected even when he wears a condom. To my mind, clearly facing these hard realities of sex makes the choice about sexual activity very simple and very uncomplicated. There is a mountain of media out there promoting a phony philosophy about the joys of casual, risky sexual experimentation; one need look no further than the junk advice featured in magazines like Cosmopolitan to see just how pernicious it is. . . .

Toxic Environment TownHall.com, By Chuck Colson, August 8, 2007
A young coed named Heather paid a visit to her campus health clinic. She told the doctor she was suffering from depression. The doctor explored possible causes, but Heather could not come up with any reasons for her sadness. Oh, wait—there is one thing, she remembered. Since Thanksgiving, she said, “I’ve had a ‘friend with benefits.’” That is, a male friend that she is not in a relationship with, but has casual sex with. “I’m really unhappy about that,” Heather said. “It’s hard to be with him and then go home and be alone.”. . . . . “We ask about childhood abuse, but not last week’s hookups,” she writes. “We want to know how many cigarettes she has each day, but not how many abortions are in her past. We consider the stress caused by parental expectations but neglect the anguish of herpes, the hazards of promiscuity, and the looming fertility issues for women who always put career first.” When it comes to sexual harassment and date rape, campus health professionals are eager to help. But they don’t support groups for women who want to practice abstinence or who are suffering the after-effects of an abortion. We ought to get angry about this. The secular world is engaging in something they often accuse Christians of—living in a “false reality.” But anyone who ignores a mountain of medical evidence is not only living in a false reality, they’re endangering people’s lives. . . .

Mel B's secret wedding to Stephen Belafonte took place in Nevada from June 6, 2007!

Mel B.’s Secret Wedding! Perez-Hilton.com, August 8,2007
Mel B. is a married woman! PerezHilton.com can exclusively reveal that the Spice Girl has married her boyfriend, movie producer Stephen Belafonte. The pair eloped in Las Vegas on June 6th and have kept the news secret until we just broke the story. “Mel’s tried very hard to keep this under wraps, especially with the paternity case against Eddie [Murphy] and everything going on,” a source tells us. “She really values her privacy.” Sources also reveal that Mel has taken steps to protect her children. “Yes, they signed a prenup,” we’ve been told. Smart! Mel also “is aware” of Belafonte’s checkered past (including arrests). . . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Mel B's marriage is a 'big mistake' says her shocked mum The Daily Mail- UK, August 13, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Eddie Murphy Says He's Paid Child Support to Mel B. People magazine, By Eunice Oh, August 3, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Eddie Murphy dumped Mel B because of affair claims paper: - Private detectives followed ex-Spice Girl says report LondonNet- UK, December 11, 2006

Better Living Through Chemistry: Why I Married My Dad American Chronicle, By Susan Kuchinskas, August 8, 2007
There comes a moment in every marriage when your spouse does something that makes you realize, "He's just like my father (or mother)." For some people, this is a moment of pleasure. If you were close to your parent of the opposite sex, it's natural that you'd look for the same qualities in your mate. The sentimental old song, "I Want a Girl Just Like the Girl that Married Dear Old Dad," expresses it perfectly. Others of us, those who struggled with our same-sex parents, grew up determined to be nothing like them. And that included marrying someone like the other parent. And yet, while your spouse looks different, came from a different background, has a different job, in fact, seemed when you met as different as could be from your mom or dad, fundamentally, you realize, he or she is your dad or mom. How did this happen?. . . . We're definitely born with a predilection to be naughty or nice, fraught or chill. But our brains and nervous systems continue to develop after we're born -- in response to our environments. For a baby, that's Mommy (or whoever is acting as primary caregiver). After the first months, Daddy, Nanny and anyone else who provides significant care help shape the baby's development. This development includes creating the basic neurochemical cocktail recipe. Just like a martini, this chemical brew influences behavior. . . .

Better Living Through Chemistry: Why I Married My Dad. We are born with special predilections, but our brains and nervous systems continue to develop after we're born, in response to our environments

Book Review: Marrying Up: The art of fortune hunting National Review Online, By Myrna Blyth, August 8, 2007
Since Cinderella it has been the oldest happy ending in the world: Poor girl marries rich guy. But is it really such a happy ending? That's one of the questions Charlotte Hays exams in her dishy new book The Fortune Hunters: Dazzling Women and the Men They Married. And though the rap may be that such women are ditzy gold diggers, Hays has considerable respect for those who make what are considered to be "fabulous marriages." According to her, these brides are shrewd, calculating, focused, and as relentless as any tycoon trying to land and close the deal of his life. . . . . The hard workers of The Fortune Hunters include Carol McDonald Portago Carey-Hughes Pistell Petrie, a blonde, still pretty as a 70-something New York socialite, who after trying and trying finally ended up the wife and then widow of Milton Petrie, a diminutive cigar-chewing, gin-rummy-playing, ragtrade millionaire. Another is the perennially girlish Marylou Schoeder Hosford Whitney, who married the rich but unappealing Cornelius "Sonny" Vanderbilt, a man "who got a bang out of being picked up in public places by his wife." At the end of their marriage Marylou nursed the bi-polar Sonny through ten years of Alzheimer's. She inherited $100 million. . . . Hays also includes several women whose marriages could not be considered good news for either bride or groom: Princess Diana, as well as Wallis Simpson, Jackie Kennedy Onassis, and Carolyn Bessette Kennedy. And she also chronicles two other women - both redheads, Arianna Huffington and Georgette Mossbacher - whose marriages to rich men were stepping stones, not to even more lucrative relationships, but to interesting careers of their own. . . .

A big role in a fight to help gays wed:
Activist Tim Gill and allies of his funded 38% of the opposition to same-sex marriage bans Denver Post, By Karen E. Crummy, August 7, 2007
Gay-rights activist Tim Gill and a network of his political allies last year funded 38 percent of the opposition to same-sex marriage bans across the country, according to a recent analysis of campaign contributions conducted by a nonpartisan group. Yet, all but one of the bans were approved by voters. Don't expect to hear any second-guessing or regrets from Gill's camp, however. . . . Gill, 53, who founded Quark Inc. in 1981 and sold his interest seven years ago, has poured millions of dollars into state races over the past few years in an effort to strengthen gay rights. In 2004, he and three other wealthy Colorado Democrats - billionaire Pat Stryker, former state Board of Education member Jared Polis and software entrepreneur Rutt Bridges - funneled millions into independent political groups. The maneuver is largely credited with giving Democrats control of the statehouse for the first time in more than 44 years. . . . . . But the Gill Action Fund's definition of success is not winning, necessarily. "We didn't expect to win in South Carolina," Guerriero said. "There isn't going to be an epiphany on gay rights. It's an incremental conversation.". . . . .

Gay-rights activist Tim Gill, Founder of Quark, Inc.

States adopt marriage ed courses Stateline.org, By Christine Vestal, August 7, 2007
Like the hapless couple in the new Robin Williams movie, "License to Wed," marriage-bound Texas residents will soon be able to go to class to learn about the ups and downs of wedded life before they tie the knot. Texas is the latest state to push marriage education, appropriating $7.5 million this year for programs aimed at reducing divorce rates and, in turn, promoting family stability and economic wellbeing. Couples who attend the Lone Star State 's optional marriage courses will be able to save the $60 they would otherwise pay for a marriage license starting September 1, 2008. At least 28 other states have similar initiatives or will soon. . .

WATCH THE TRAILER: LICENSE TO WED

RELATED REVIEW: License to wed Hollywood Reporter, By Kirk Honeycutt, July 2, 2007

Excitement deprives children of happiness

Parenting Issues: Excitement Deprives Children of Happiness TownHall.com, By Dennis Prager, August 7, 2007
If you want your children to be happy adults and even happy children -- and what parent does not? -- minimize the excitement in their lives. The more excitement, the less happy they are likely to be. In both adults and children, one can either pursue excitement or pursue happiness, but one cannot do both. If you pursue excitement, you will not attain happiness. If you pursue happiness, you will still experience some moments of excitement, but you will attain happiness only if happiness, not excitement, is your goal. . . . Today's young people have the ability to experience excitement more than any generation in history. Outside of school, excitement is available almost 24/7. MTV is exciting (MTV has done far more damage to this generation than has the tobacco industry); video games are exciting; the nearly all-pervasive sexual stimuli are exciting; MySpace (largely a human cesspool) is exciting; getting tattooed is exciting; piercings are exciting; many pictures and videos on the Internet are exciting. The list of exciting things many children experience is as long as there are hours in the day. . .

Parenting Issues: When Talking Family Values, Let’s Not Forget Single Moms’ Very Real, Often Tragic Struggles BlackAmericaWeb.com, By: Deborah Mathis, August 06, 2007
The woman’s story was all too common. Every morning, she would get her young son out to school and then head off in a different direction for her necessary but dead-end job. There, after a long commute, she would put in a long full day, with a half-hour off for lunch and two 10-minute breaks. Whether her son was really out of control or just a normally rambunctious seven-year-old is debatable, but whatever his true condition, the school authorities were constantly calling the boy’s mother, insisting on impromptu conferences or that she come and get her son. The woman had no position to speak of at work. . . . . . This nameless woman came to mind the other day in a much more tragic circumstance in South Carolina, where a 27-year-old woman, stuck in a powerless job, came out to her car to find her two young children dead from heat and suffocation. Sametta Heyward had left them there because the babysitter failed to show. According to her lawyer, who appeared on Bev Smith’s syndicated radio show Thursday night, Ms. Heyward had left food and a battery-operated fan in the car -- details omitted from the first news reports of the tragedy. The young mother, distraught, bereaved and scared to death, has been charged with homicide in the deaths of four-year-old Shawn and one-year-old Triniti. . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: South Carolina shares blame with Sametta Heyward: State of Shame: A family tragedy in a family values state Charleston City Paper, By Will Moredock August 8, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Detailed suicide note: Mother describes path to children's deaths   The Post and Courier, By Andy Paras, August 2, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Cohabitation, unwed motherhood soaring in younger generation USA Today, By Sharon Jayson, July 1, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Declining Marriage Rates Aren’t Just a Black Family Thing – They're an American Thing BlackAmericaWeb.com, By Joseph C. Phillips, July 17, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: The Elephant in the Room While Black Kids Misbehave? Single Parent Homes   BlackAmericaWeb.com, By Joseph C Phillips, Jan 24, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Marriage and Caste: America's chief source of inequality? The Marriage Gap City Journal, By Kay S. Hymowitz, January 17, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: The Most Effective Anti-Poverty Program Ever Created? Marriage    BlackAmericaWeb.com, By Joseph C. Phillips, Oct 10, 2005

Parenting Issues: The Gap Year Washington Post magazine, By Ian Shapira, August 6, 2007
Exhausted from the pressures of high school and the college application process, some students are deferring their college enrollment for a year -- to pursue other interests or passions before hitting the books again. In this week's issue of Washington Post Magazine, Post reporter Ian Shapira talked to area students embarking on a "gap year." Joining Shapira will be Marlyn McGrath Lewis, director of admissions at Harvard College and Holly Bull, president of the Center for Interim Programs with offices in Princeton, N.J., and Cambridge, Mass. A transcript follows. . . . . Brunswick, Md.: Can high school students be admitted to college and then defer the admission for one year rather than simply taking a year off? That way they would not have the new pressures at the end of the 'year off' to apply to college. . . . Marlyn McGrath: A good question, and helpful. Most students who defer Harvard admission, for example, have already been admitted. (We suggest in the admission letter that they consider deferring, because we are so persuaded of the value of maturity and self-direction.) But other students do apply to us during a gap year. . . . .

The Gap Year: Exhausted from the pressures of high school and the college application process, some students are deferring - for a year - to pursue other interests or passions before hitting the books again

Presidential hopeful Fred Thompson's camp is tight-lipped about wife Jeri's previous marital status

Thompson Camp Tight-Lipped About Wife Jeri Washington Post Blog- The Sleuth, By Mary Ann Akers, August 6, 2007
Fred Thompson's "testing the waters" campaign hasn't done itself any favors by being so evasive when it comes to questions about Mrs. Thompson. Perhaps if the topic weren't so shrouded in mystery, Newsweek magazine wouldn't have created a mini firestorm with its story this week suggesting Jeri Kehn Thompson may have been married before - and possibly never divorced - since her name pops up in public records as Jeri Kehn Alvey, which is the last name of her ex-boyfriend. "It's unclear exactly when she may have been married or when she may have gotten divorced," the magazine wrote. "When asked directly about it, the campaign would neither confirm nor deny a previous marriage." Why the secrecy? It certainly piqued the interest of other political reporters who wondered why the campaign wouldn't have simply said "No, she has never been married before" if, in fact, she had never been married before. . . .

Three-year-itch!
With divorces increasing by the day, the proverbial seven-year itch has now narrowed to three years, suggest the latest studies Times of India, By Nona Walia, August 5, 2007
. . . . Forget the proverbial seven-year-old itch, new research suggest the shelf life of bliss has become shorter. It's shrunk to three now! Prof Kelly Musick, sociologist, University of Southern California, who led the research, says, "The early spark of marriage is now fading earlier. Unhappiness can start as soon as you cut the wedding cake." In fact, Gitanjali Prasad, author of The Great Indian Family, believes, "There are two kinds of housewives in India -- desperate and blissful. And both are experiencing discontentment early in marriage. While the homemaker is comparing herself to the working lot, feeling worthless, and mourning the loss of her identity, the superwoman working wife is feeling pressured as she's an over-performer. After all, long working hours have adverse effects on the marriage. They are feeling they're being pulled in different directions." Is there anything like a three-year itch? Says Dr Kanika Khandelwal, professor of psychology at LSR College, Delhi, "There's nothing in the magical number three, but yes, the tolerance levels of couples have gone down considerably.". . . .

Three-year-itch: With divorces increasing by the day, the proverbial seven-year itch has now narrowed to three years, suggest the latest studies

Great Wedding! But Was It Legal? New York Times, By Devan Sipher, August 5, 2007
In an era of six-figure weddings when couples obsess about the band playlist and hand towels for the restrooms, one question may get short shrift: Is the person performing the wedding legally able to do so? Daniel Morales and Gwendolyn Baxter thought they knew. Their outdoor ceremony two summers ago in Farmington, Conn., was performed by a friend who had been ordained online by the Universal Life Church. Having heard of other couples who were married that way, they assumed it was legal. But Connecticut is one of a half-dozen places that do not recognize marriages performed by someone who became a minister for the sole purpose of marrying people. Such a minister “doesn’t meet the requirements of the state statutes,” said William Gerrish, a spokesman for the Connecticut Department of Public Health. . . . The Universal Life Church alone has ordained more than 18 million ministers since it was founded in 1959 in Modesto, Calif. The organization ordains 10,000 people a month, twice as many as in 2000, according to Andre Hensley, the church’s president. Eighty percent join the fold solely to perform weddings, he said. The Church of Spiritual Humanism, the Rose Ministries and the Temple of Earth, which describes itself as a “religion-free religion,” also have online ministry sites. . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Usher-Tameka Foster wedding is canceled USA Today, July 28, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Usher's Fiancee Tameka Foster Speaks Out on the Rumors, Romance and the Rock: Tameka's Turn - PART I Essence.com, By Keyna N. Byrd, June 21, 2007
As rumors swirl around her engagement to R&B superstar Usher, celebrity stylist Tameka Foster shares a few confessions of her own with essence.com about the end of her marriage, her alleged pregnancy and being labeled a gold digger.

RELATED ARTICLE: Usher's Fiancee Tameka Foster Speaks Out on the Rumors, Romance and the Rock: Tameka's Turn - PART II Essence.com, By Kenya N. Byrd, June 21, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: MIFFED BY HIS MOM? How to Make Amends With Your Mother-in-Law Elegala.com

Eddie finally admits 'I'm the daddy' as his exes, Nicole Mitchell and Mel B unite

Eddie finally admits 'I'm the daddy' as his exes unite The Daily Mail- UK, August 4, 2007
Eddie Murphy has publicly acknowledged he's the father Spice Girls singer Melanie Brown's baby. A brief statement issued by Murphy's publicist said the 46-year-old star of "Dreamgirls" and the "Beverly Hills Cop" movies "always has and will continue to honor his responsibilities as a father." The admission comes after Mel B brought a paternity suit against Murphy earlier this week and she was thought to be 'teaming up' with his ex-wife. The Spice Girl and Murphy's other ex Nicole Mitchell, who divorced the Hollywood superstar in 2006, spent the afternoon enjoying a "really friendly" lunch - in a scene which would no doubt send shivers down Murphy's spine. . . . "They seemed really friendly toward one another," a source tells People.com. "They had a pretty private meal in the back corner, away from all of us." Brown, 32, dated Murphy last year following his divorce from Mitchell after 12 years of marriage. The couple have five children together. .

RELATED ARTICLE: Mel B: Eddie Murphy and I Planned Baby, Marriage People magazine, By Sara Hammel, July 25, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Eddie Murphy/Melanie Brown saga: Part 1 - Moving On: Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown Essence.com, By Kenya N. Byrd, July 24, 2007
In the first part of their exclusive interview, ESSENCE.com speaks to Mel B on her former flame Eddie Murphy and the DNA results.

RELATED ARTICLE: Eddie Murphy/Melanie Brown saga: Part 2 - Moving On: Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown Essence.com, By Kenya N. Byrd, July 25, 2007
In the second part of their exclusive two-part interview, ESSENCE.com speaks to Mel B about her new beau, her tough-as-nails attorney, and whether her daughter Angel will ever meet her famous father.

RELATED BLOG: Hollywood Unhooked (Unglued, more precise) The Real Proposal magazine BlogSpot, December 11, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Melanie Brown: 'Eddie Is A Poor Role Model For Black Fathers'. Femailfirst-UK, May 3, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Don't Jump into bed before marriage Vanguard Online, Nigeria- By Folake Aina, May 27, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: The Interruption of Everything: Life after Eddie will be vastly different for Nicole Murphy, but with five children to love and a new life ahead of her, she’s ready to face it. Find out what it took for her to walk away Essence.com, By Audrey Edwards, April 2006 Issue

RELATED ARTICLE: Nicole Murphy: WebExclusive Essence.com, April 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Black Men and Child Support: Should Men Be Able to Opt Out of Parenthood? AOL Black Voices- By Angela Bronner, Updated April 19, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Dads: No cash for unwanted children- In lawsuit, activists argue if women have right to decide fate of fetus, fathers can decline financial role The Detroit News- David Shepardson and Eric Lacy, Mar 9, 2006

Love and marriage … and some financial tips Colorado Springs Business Journal, By Sarah Colwell, August 3, 2007
My little brother married his college sweetheart this past weekend, and instead of getting him a set of knives or towels, I decided to give him something he could really use to help his life and his marriage — tools for his finances. Money is often a heated topic of discussion early and often in a marriage. According to a CNN Money study, 84 percent of couples surveyed said money causes tension in their marriage and 13 percent say they fight about money several times a month. Managing money can become a source of arguments within a relationship because it often is synonymous with power. A person might feel entitled to have more of a say in money decisions in a relationship if he or she earns more income than the other person. One person in the relationship might be a spender, while the other person might be a saver. One or both people in the relationship might bring a lot of debt to a marriage. The list goes on and on. . . . The right tools: I wanted to give my brother some financial tools and pieces of advice I wish I had been given earlier in my marriage, and hopefully prevent some arguments in his marriage, at least those involving money. The first tool I got him was “Smart Couples Finish Rich” by David Bach. . . .

RELATED ARTICLE:   Saving a marriage: Spend, save or give? Understanding your partner can save you a trip to divorce court MSNBC.com- Forbes.com, By Scott Reeves, May 31, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Talk About Money Forbes.com- By Scott Reeves, Apr 10, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Family (Financial) Planning Forbes.com- By Scott Reeves, Apr 15, 2005

RELATED ARTICLE: What Makes Wives Happy?   WebMD - By Salynn Boyles, Mar 1, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: University of Virginia Study Finds Commitment to Marriage, Emotional Engagement Key to Wives' Happiness   University of Virginia News, Mar 1, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Want to Be Wealthy? Try Marriage CNNMoney.com, January 18, 2006

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES:   "What's Love Got to do With It?" (pdf)

RELATED ARTICLE: First Comes Love, Then Financial Planning Forbes.com- By Scott Reeves, Feb 9, 2005

The Story of Wife No. 3: Presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani and wife no. 3 Judith

The Story of Wife No. 3 Washington Post, By Howard Kurtz, August 2 2007
Let's see: We the media have done Jeri the trophy wife. Elizabeth the cancer-stricken, Coulter-challenging strategist. Bill the questionable, once-philandering spouse. Andrew the disaffected son. Chelsea the once-and-possibly-future First Daughter. And now it's Judith Giuliani's turn. Rudy's former mistress already had a big rollout in the media when the couple sat down with Barbara Walters and the former mayor said she could sit in on Cabinet meetings. Then there was the revelation about the second ex-husband who she had somehow failed to mention. Judith disappeared for awhile.The problem for her is that she can't freely talk about how they met (in a Manhattan cigar bar, it turns out) and courted because she was, at the time, the Other Woman in one of the ugliest public divorces in modern history. Even by New York tabloid standards, the accusations that were hurled between Hizzoner's camp and Donna Hanover's side were extraordinarily personal. How interested should we be in Rudy's third wife? . . . . But if he wins, the former Judith Nathan would be first lady of the United States. She would automatically become one of the most high-profile women in the world. There is, quite simply, no way to wall her off from the media coverage. Now comes Vanity Fair, with a Judy Bachrach profile of Mrs. G that is, shall we say, less than flattering. . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Giuliani's Princess Bride   Vanity Fair, By Judy Bachrac, September 2007 Issue
Judith Giuliani always dreamed big, which got her out of small-town Pennsylvania, through two marriages, and into the arms of Rudy Giuliani. But, as her husband runs for president, people are asking, "Who does she think she is?"

RELATED ARTICLE: That's No Way to Treat a (First) Lady   TownHall.com, By Maggie Gallagher, August 8, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Giuliani's daughter 'backs Obama' BBC News, UK - Aug 7, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Dethroning that woman: Judith Giuliani TownHall.com, By Kathleen Parker, August 3, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: It's ‘Attack Giuliani' Day on CNN's ‘American Morning' NewsBusters.org, By Matthew Balan, August 2, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Mad Mate Media: Clawing at Judi National Review Online, By Myrna Blyth, August 1, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Judi Giuliani's Secret Husband Revealed New York Post, By Andrea Peyser and Maggie Haberman, March 22, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: Political Video of the Day: Team Rudy & Judy New York Sun Politics Blog, Posted by Ryan Sager, March 14, 2007

RELATED ARTICLE: First Lady of the Hamptons: Judith Giuliani   Dan's Magazine-Hampton's Style, July 4, 2006

Canada Urged to Review Legality Of Polygamy Ban New York Times- REUTERS, August 1, 2007
- A special prosecutor has recommended Canadian courts be asked to rule on the constitutionality of the country's long-standing laws against polygamy, officials said on Wednesday. But the independent prosecutor, prominent Canadian criminal attorney Richard Peck, has recommended that criminal charges not be filed against a U.S.-linked religious community that has openly practiced polygamy in Western Canada for years. Peck said pursuing the charges related to sex with underage girls would not likely results in convictions on the "available evidence," but the case left unanswered the broader issue of how Canada should handle the issue of plural marriage. . . . . . . The Royal Canadian Mounted Police had recommended charges be filed against unspecified members of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (FLDS). Police launched the investigation in 2006 following media reports that leaders of the FLDS community in Bountiful, in southeastern British Columbia, had forced underage girls into marriages with older men. . . .

RELATED ARTICLE: Gay marriage now, polygamy later U.S. News & World Report, By John Leo, Mar 22, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Pandora and Polygamy The Washington Post, By Charles Krauthammer, Mar 17, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Polygamists, Unite! They used to live quietly, but now they're making noise Newsweek- By Elise Soukup, Mar 20, 2006 Issue

RELATED ARTICLE: Cultural death wishes Townhall.com, By Debra Saunders, January 20, 2006

RELATED ARTICLE: Study proposes legalizing polygamy Today's Family News- CANADA, January 18, 2006

RELATED STUDY: Polygamy in Canada: Legal and Social Implications for Women and Children – A Collection of Policy Research Reports Last updated Jan 13, 2006

More Marriage News: July 2007