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"MARRIAGE" In The News
(August 2006) |
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The news articles and features presented below are simply an indication of how topical, controversial, and all-encompassing the issues surrounding marriage are throughout our society--and the world-- today. Some of the views and opinions expressed, and their respective web sites, do NOT reflect the views or opinions of The Real Proposal™ magazine. Many are highlighted largely to reiterate that the alarming statistical trends on the chaotic state of "Marriage" and "Family"--outlined in "A Mere Glimpse"--will continue unabated without a fundamental grasp and purposeful dissemination of TRUTH on the issues.
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- Thanks, Juan Williams,
for Echoing What Black Conservatives Have Been Saying for
Years BlackAmericaWeb.com, By Gregory
Kane, August 30, 2006
. . . . . Juan Williams'
new book dropped Aug. 1. You can tell why I’ve had 31 consecutive
good days just by the title: “Enough: The Phony Leaders,
Dead-End Movements, and Culture of Failure That are Undermining
Black America — and What We Can Do About It.”. . . . . So,
here’s some of what the visionary Williams has to say:. . . . . “In
the 30 years from 1950 to 1980, households headed by black women
who never married jumped from 3.8 per thousand to 69.7 per
thousand. That, too, had real consequences. In 1940, 75 percent of
black children lived with both parents. By 1990, only 33 percent of
black children lived with a mom and a dad … And there is no
question about the impact on black children. With both parents in
the house, they do better in school; the children of married people
also have fewer run-ins with the police, as well as better
self-esteem, and are more likely to enter into marriage before
having children. This is a cycle of success, creating more success
and prosperity.”. . . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Parenting Issues: Bill Cosby:
African-Americans 'Not Holding Up Their End of the
Deal' ABCNews.com, June 29, 2005
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- Barkley speaks out on religion, gay
marriage
Ex-NBA star elaborates political views while
considering gubernatorial
run MSNBC.com-AP August 30, 2006
- Charles Barkley was his
usual outspoken self during a recent television interview in which
he said, among other things, that he advocates gay marriage,
believes Republicans have screwed up the country and is “struggling
with my idea of what religion is.”. . . . .“I think if they
want to get married, God bless them,” Barkley said. “Gay marriage
is probably 1 percent of the population, so it’s not like it’s
going to be an epidemic. Hey, trust me, I’m never going to kiss you
and say, ‘Chris, you’re sexy.”’. . . .
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- Beyond babies? TownHall.com, By Maggie Gallagher, August 29,
2006
What lies "beyond
babies"? That's the question Newsweek raises in its
latest cover story on the looming depopulation crisis in Europe and
Asia. But Newsweek (I kid you not) says it means "good things for
restaurants and real estate". . . . So Newsweek tries to
stuff perhaps the biggest story of our time -- the sudden collapse
of childbearing to below-replacement levels in virtually every
free, democratic and affluent nation on this Earth -- into a happy
tale of a new generation's lifestyle liberation from that old ugly
"social corset" of marriage and family. . . . What lies beyond
babies? Death. Death of the individual, and of his or her family.
Death of the nation, tribe or culture that adopts a set of beliefs,
practices and institutional arrangements that fail to respect and
support generativity. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Beyond Babies:
Why More Married Couples Are going
Childless Newsweek International, By Stefan Theil, Sept. 4, 2006
issue
RELATED ARTICLE: REPORT:
Life Without Children The State of Our Unions: The Social Health of
Marriage in America 2006 National Marriage
Project-Rutgers University, By Barbara Dafoe Whitehead
& David Popenoe
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- Couple's Marriage Strained By Katrina 1 Year
Later cbs4denver.com-CO, By Molly Hughes, August 29, 2006
A year after Hurricane Katrina forced Betty Sanchez
and her children to flee Louisiana and head for her mother's house
in Denver, she is dealing with the collateral damage to her
marriage and the rest of her life. Betty's husband Carlos has
stayed in Louisiana to do his job with the National Guard. "In a
way, it's a blessing that I've had so much growth and I'm stronger
now as a person," Betty said. "But the bad thing about it is, it
might be tearing my marriage apart." . . . . .
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- Postnuptial
depression: from white to blue The
Independent- UK, By Maxine Frith, August 29, 2006
It was the best day of
your life. But if you're still waiting for the 'happy ever after'
bit, you may have postnuptial depression. For Hayley Brown, the
post-wedding blues hit soon after the honeymoon with her husband
Wesley. "It was really weird," she says. "We had spent 18 months
saving and planning and making sure everything was perfect, and
then, in a single day, it's all over. I kind of thought - what now?
There didn't seem to be anything to talk about or look forward to,
and then I just felt really, really down - it was horrible." She is
not alone. According to relationship experts, one new spouse in 10
will experience postnuptial depression to a greater or lesser
degree. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Even Bridezillas get the
post-nuptial blues The
Austrailian- The Sunday Times, August 7, 2006
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- Polygamist sect leader arrested in Las
Vegas USA Today - August 29,
2006
Warren Steed Jeffs, head of the nation's largest
polygamist sect and one of the FBI's 10 Most Wanted fugitives, was
captured in Nevada late Monday in what began as a routine traffic
stop, authorities said today. Jeffs, 50, was pulled over by a
Nevada Highway Patrol trooper on Interstate 15 just north of Las
Vegas, FBI spokesman David Staretz said. Jeffs, who had a $100,000
reward hanging over his head, is wanted in Utah and Arizona on
suspicion of sexual misconduct for allegedly arranging marriages
between underage girls and older men. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Polygamist charged with rape: Jeffs arranged marriage for
a child, county says Deseret News,
UT, By Ben Winslow and Nancy Perkins, Apr 7, 2006
RELATED
ARTICLE: Court
transcipt offers teen girl's view on plural
marriage Scripps Howard News Service- Salt lake
Tribune By Brooke Adams, Apr 5, 2006
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- Group dating
takes off in China BBC News.com, August 28
2006
Busy Chinese urbanites are flocking to try
something new in the quest for love - group dating. The mass
events, which draw hundreds of single men and women, have climbed
in popularity since they were introduced in Chinese cities. One
event in Zhejiang in April attracted 12,658 participants, Xinhua
news agency said, while 10,000 showed up for another in Shanghai.
The events appeal to China's new ranks of urban educated
professionals. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Alfresco marriage market: In China, parents are clinging
to low-tech matchmaking methods San Francisco
Chronicle, By Olivia Wu, August 20, 2006
RELATED
ARTICLE: Seeking
marriage on the streets, romantic or what?
China Daily- China, Oct 14, 2005
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- Life
Support: What's the key to a good marriage?
Backrubs Pittsburg Post
Gazette- PA, By Chris Erskine- LA Times, August 28, 2006
-- I love her ferociously, but after 24 years of
marriage we can argue over almost any little thing, and then not
resolve it. Like where the bed should go, against the wall, under
the window, in the street. . . . Besides that, I'm the Dick Butkus
of backrubs, all elbows and knees, hurling myself into my work with
reckless zeal, no matter the score. I once pulled a hamstring
giving my wife a backrub. And there was talk of a mild concussion.
. . . . .
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- First gay marriage in Nepal
Nepal News, August 27, 2006
In what seemed as a
strange event for general Nepali people, two men Anil Mahaju and
Diya Kashyap got married on Saturday, on the day of the Haritalika
Teej, one of the greatest festival of Hindu women. . . . Dressed in
a red sari and a glittering see-through veil, the shy bride looked
just like any other Nepali bride. The male bride also said that the
new constitution should guarantee the rights of homosexuals in the
new constitution. . . .
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- Marriage ‘everyone’s right’
Border Mail, Australia - Aug 27, 2006
ACTOR Lily Tomlin
has criticised the US and Australian governments over their
opposition to same-sex marriage, saying everyone should have the
right to wed. The openly-gay Hollywood veteran, 66, has been
with her female partner, Jane Wagner, a writer and producer, for 35
years. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Tomlin's opinion of PM's politics no Laugh-In
matter The Austrailian, By
Jane Fraser , August 28, 2006
RELATED
ARTICLE: Christina Aguilera: gay marriage ban is “really
unfair” Fametastic, UK - Aug 26,
2006
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- Hasselhoff 'tricked' wife into signing
pre-nup The
Daily Mail-UK, By CAROLINE GRAHAM, August 26,
2006
Baywatch star David Hasselhoff
was so desperate to protect his £25million fortune that he made his
wife sign a pre-nuptial agreement just 30 minutes before they were
married. Pamela Bach was in her wedding dress waiting to walk down
the aisle when her husband-to-be thrust a pen and paper into her
hands. Thinking it was a marriage licence, the bit-part actress put
her signature on it. The astonishing events were revealed in new
court papers filed in Los Angeles last week as part of one of
Hollywood's most notoriously bitter divorces. . . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Sign
before tying knot, or not? Leader-Post- CANADA .com, By Fiona Anderson-
CanWest News Service, August 28, 2006
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- Castro Has the
Marriage Relapse Kommersant- Moscow, August 26, 2006
Mirta Diaz-Balart, 78, has
arrived in Cuba this week. She is the sole of many beloved, whom
the Cuban leader married officially. Diaz-Balart lives in Spain,
going to Cuba from time to time to meet the son. But the purpose of
the current visit is different. For the first time in many decades,
she has come to the hated former husband, signaling the 80-year
Castro is living his dying days actually. . . . . . Nearly all
former sweethearts of Fidel Castro have one feeling in common – the
hatred for Fidel, whom they once loved so dearly. . .
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- I've given away seven babies, but I'd like to keep the next
one The
Daily Mail, By HELEN WEATHERS, August 25, 2006
. . . So what has happened to change Jill Hawkins's
mind? So much so that - after years of firm insistence that she has
never wanted children of her own - she is now talking about the
possibility of falling in love, getting married and having a baby.
Her own baby. . . . Jill, who has since lost 7st, insists that her
depression was not caused by the emotional strain of giving away so
many babies, but rather by underlying issues which have always been
there - but one wonders if she is being entirely honest with
herself. For the two appear to be inextricably linked. . .
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- Just as marriage is coming back in vogue
… The Sydney Morning
Herald-AUSTRAILIA, By Miranda Devine, August 24,
2006
WHEN 42-year-old mother of two
Helen Kirwan-Taylor wrote a newspaper article last month saying she
finds motherhood boring, she became the most vilified woman in
Britain. "Sorry, but my children bore me to death" was the title of
her article in the Daily Mail in which she confessed to hating
reading bedtime stories and spending two hours texting her
girlfriends while watching a movie with her children. Readers
condemned her as a selfish princess who shouldn't be allowed to
have children. But her confession also broke a taboo around the
modern female's dissatisfaction with family life. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Sorry,
but my children bore me to death!
The Daily Mail, By HELEN KIRWAN-TAYLOR, July
26, 2006
RELATED
ARTICLE: Make
time to baby your marriage, too
Swap that kids-first approach for a marriage-first mind-set; your
children will thank you for it The
Free Lance-Star- VA, By Kim Baer, August 22,
2006
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- Laptop Slides Into Bed in Love
Triangle NEW YORK TIMES, By KATIE HAFNER, August 24, 2006
LARRY SMITH knows
he is treading a fine marital line. Mr. Smith, 37, is the editor of
Smith, an online magazine he founded, and he loves to work in bed
at all hours — midafternoon, 2 a.m. if insomnia strikes, then again
in the morning. Yet Mr. Smith is all too aware of his wife’s
mounting disapproval of his routine and suspects that a
laptop-in-bed ban could be imminent. . . . .
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- Puff Diddy Should Consider
Marriage Playfuls.com-Romania, by Andreea P., August 23,
2006
Rapper Sean "Diddy" Combs and his girlfriend Kim Porter are
"happy to confirm that they are expecting their second child
together and they are thrilled about the news” Combs'
representative, Keesha Johnson, said Tuesday. The couple already
has a son, 8-year-old Christian since their previous relationship.
The two have been on and off sice 1990 and in late 1999 the two
broke up. They’ve got back together in March 2003, and Diddy
confessed back then "My love life is straight. I’m back with Kim",
and since they ended up together, why not get married. . . . .
RELATED CELEBRITY ARTICLE: 'TomKat'
thumbs nose at marriage and reality IndyStar.com, By Lori Borgman, April 23,
2006
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- Careers and Marriage Forbes.com, August 23, 2006
Forbes.com published a story Aug. 22 by editor
Michael Noer on two-career relationships that provoked a heated
response from both outside and inside our building. Elizabeth
Corcoran, a member of our Silicon Valley bureau and principal
author of the magazine's current cover story on robots, sent in
this rebuttal. . . . .
POINT: Don't
Marry Career Women Forbes.com, By Michael Noer, August 22, 2006
COUNTERPOINT: Don't
Marry A Lazy Man Forbes.com, By Elizabeth Corcoran, August 23, 2006
RELATED
ARTICLE: Working women more likely to
divorce Telegraph.co.uk- UK, Jul 10, 2005
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- Leap of faith but no quick
fix The Daily Telegraph- Austrailia, By
Anita Quigley, August 23, 2006
THIS time last year I
attended religious instruction classes to convert to Islam. Not
because I intended to become a Muslim but because I was keen to see
who did. . . .Yet equally crucial to being a good Muslim is getting
married. Indeed, the prophet Mohammed insisted upon his followers
marrying. However it is this aspect of their new religion that they
have so rapidly and willingly embraced that gives concern. . . .
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- Marrying again to get her husband
back IBNLive, August 22, 2006
Kolkata: Islamic clerics have ruled that a woman
divorced by her husband in a fit of drunkenness can remarry him
only after she takes another husband for one day. Ershad, a
rickshaw puller, uttered the word talaq, three times earlier this
month while he was drunk, and when news leaked out in their village
in eastern Orissa state, the clerics said they must separate. . . .
Earlier this year, another Muslim couple in West Bengal was told by
local religious leaders they must separate after the man uttered
talaq three times in his sleep. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Court
Annuls Marriage for Violation of Social Custom
Arab News, Saudi Arabia, August 21,
2006
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- What marriage means in the New York
Times Lansing State Journal, MI, By Matt Katz, August 22,
2006
... The New York Times wedding section is like the
richest kid in class. School bus drivers, dishwasher repairmen and
union carpenters need not apply. This is for high-powered lawyers
and hot models, cancer researchers and dentists who have small,
white dogs and live in shiny apartment buildings. Not only are the
people getting married of a certain pedigree, but The Times
actually explains just how rich, educated and fancy these people
are. . . .Since The Times started including gay couples in its
papers in 2002, newspapers across the country have followed suit,
and in the process a new vocabulary has been introduced to the
world of weddings. The gay couples "affirm their partnerships" with
both male and female "interfaith ministers" at "commitment
ceremonies." It's a description of marriage that is hardly
religious and entirely gender neutral - reflective, maybe, of what
marriage for many people has already become. . . .
RELATED SITE: Weddings
& Celebrations The New York Times
- Las Vegas marriage business no longer
24-7 KARE 11-MN, August 22, 2006
Getting married is as much a tradition in Las Vegas
as slot machines and buffets. But when the urge to merge comes in
the wee hours, you'll have to wait. The county government says
starting next week, its marriage license bureau will no longer be
open 24-seven. . . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Changes
Proposed to Las Vegas' 24-Hour Marriage Licenses
KLAS-TV 8, By I- Team Reporter Mark Sayre,
July 24, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: SEE
PROPOSED CHANGES
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- Tips on surviving the top five most
common newlywed roadblocks The Wichita Eagle, KS -BY ALONNA FRIEDMAN,
-The Nest, August 22, 2006
Nothing in life is seamless (OK, maybe quality
stockings). As you begin life as newly hitched, you will
likely encounter a hitch or two (we couldn't resist). Seriously:
It's totally normal, and you have nothing to fear. Yes, even that
happy-looking couple holding hands in the park, who seem perfect
and without conflict in their lives, are adjusting to snags in
their relationship. Maybe they just know how to handle bumps better
than you. Well, not for long. Here are the top five most common
newlyweds dilemmas -- and how to solve them.
* Issue No. 1: My in-laws are too involved in our
lives: You live in the same house, share a bank account and use the
same shower soap, but your in-laws (and maybe even your own
parents) might not recognize that a new fledging family needs room
to grow. Parents will always see their child as an
extension of THEIR family -- new spouse included. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: 7 mistakes even smart newly weds
make The
Wichita Eagle, KS, August 1, 2006
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- Make time to baby your marriage, too
Swap that kids-first approach for a marriage-first
mind-set; your children will thank you for
it The Free Lance-Star- VA, By Kim Baer, August 22,
2006
A FEW WEEKS ago, my husband and I took a day off
together. We went out to breakfast together, took in a movie and
relaxed. It was long overdue. Between the demands of work and
raising two young children, we'd put "couple time" on the back
burner. Believe me, it was starting to show. Parents should
rethink this "kids first" approach, family counselors say. . . . .
Children feel more safe and secure when their parents put their
marriage first. When your children see that you have a great
marriage, they can grow up and leave without guilt. Think of it
this way: you are modeling a marriage for your children. They'll
learn what to expect from a partnership from you. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Sorry,
but my children bore me to death!
The Daily Mail, By HELEN KIRWAN-TAYLOR, July
26, 2006
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- Catch 22: Get caught in a good
marriage YourHub.com, By Jan Fallon, August 21,
2006
Does this sound familiar? A wife has exhausted herself
pursuing a husband who has disengaged from her and the kids. She
finally reaches her limit and threatens to file for a divorce. That
gets his attention and he makes an attempt to engage - perhaps by
asking her out on a date, or by taking the kids to the zoo. He soon
discovers he's not earning any points. His wife is distant and
unimpressed. He ends up thinking, "Why do I
bother?" Catch-22 is in full swing. . . . .
RELATED RESOURCE: Secret that Cracks the Communication Code {Love and
Respect.com} By Emerson E.
Eggerichs, PhD
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- ISTAT:
ITALIAN COUPLES LIVE TOGETHER BEFORE
MARRIAGE Agenzia
Giornalistica Italia, August 21, 2006
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Istat (Italy's statistics
institute), has provided an interesting
picture of Italian couples from engagement to marriage conducting a
study based on a research carried out in November 2003 on a sample
of 19,000 families (totalling 49,000 people). Prospect partners
usually meet for the first time and get to know each other at
friends', on holidays or in the workplace (or at school). Their
engagement usually lasts five years and they often choose to start
living together a couple of years before the marriage. Finally they
get married either because their relationship has proven successful
or because they want a baby. On the day of the marriage. . . .
- Marriage in Africa: Women Unable to Divorce
Easily Voice of America -By Douglas Mpuga, August 21, 2006
. . . Nakakande told VOA English to Africa reporter
Douglas Mpuga that divorce is not common in Africa. People do not
have a clear understanding of what divorce actually is.” Nakakande
said that given the power relations created by culture and
traditions, it is easier for men than women to initiate
divorce. “In Uganda, even when a woman is widowed, it is the
male relatives who decide her fate. Rural widows are not even
allowed to remarry. . . .
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- Man shoots wife after seeing India film on
marriage Reuters.uk, UK - August 21, 2006
MUMBAI (Reuters) - An Indian man who took his wife
to a hit Bollywood film about marital tensions hoping she would
allow him to marry again shot her after she refused, police and a
newspaper said. The Mumbai Mirror daily said on Monday the wife had
left his home with their two children after a marital spat. But on
Saturday, they had made up and went to see "Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna"
(Never Say Goodbye), a Hindi film about couples finding love
outside marriage, which has been playing to packed houses in Indian
cities. The newspaper said the 32-year-old man's real
intention in taking his wife to the movie was to persuade her to
allow him to marry his girlfriend. . . . .
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RELATED
ARTICLE: At
local cinemas, it's hooray for
Bollywood Boston Globe (Free Subscription)- US, By Swati Gauri
Sharma, August 20, 2006. RELATED
ARTICLE: Separated happily ever
after? Mumbai Mirror, India - August 21, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: Bollywood Gets Real, Taking On the Modern Indian
Marriage NEW YORK TIMES, By Anupama Chopra,
July 30, 2006
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- Court Annuls Marriage for Violation of Social
Custom Arab News, Saudi
Arabia, August 21, 2006
DAMMAM — A happy three-year-long marriage of a Saudi
couple with two children has been annulled by a court on the
grounds that it violates social custom and practice, Al-Watan
reported. The woman, Fatima, is a tribal Saudi and the man,
Mansoor, is non-tribal. The court in Al-Jouf ruled that the
marriage was illegal because the man’s social status was not equal
to the woman’s. . . . .
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- Marriage in glass houses Arbiter Online- ID, By Shannon Morgan, August 21,
2006
Marriage. What kinds of feelings and thoughts do you
experience when you hear that word? I recently went to a friends
bachelorette party to celebrate one of her last nights as a single
woman. When you say the word marriage to her she lights up with
excitement and is quite simply radiant. The word marriage to me
brings about an entirely different feeling that I can safely say
makes me in no way radiant. Not by any stretch of the imagination.
Having just begun my divorce proceedings I have a completely
different perspective on this cultural staple in our society. . . .
. It occurs to me that this country needs to be less concerned with
how gays and lesbians will dirty the sanctity of marriage and more
concerned with how we have done a fine job of that ourselves. More
than half of the families with children who experience divorce move
into poverty. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Love,
marriage and ... lutefish? Winona Daily News, By T.J. Lettner, August 20,
2006
RELATED ARTICLE: What
marriage really needs is rewards NorthJersey.com (Scripps Howard News Service), By
David Waters June 22, 2006
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- Black teens wary of marrying, say it
ends in disaster Chicago Tribune-US, By Vanessa E. Jones, The Boston
Globe, August 20, 2006
BOSTON -- As African-American teenagers offer their
opinions on marriage, their comments reveal a dreary view of the
institution. "I'm not looking forward to marriage," says
Nakeeda Burns, a 17-year-old resident of Revere, and daughter of a
single mother, "and I don't think we [people in general] should be
married because I see how other marriages ended up in my family and
on television. It's always a disaster.". . . . .
RELATED
ARTICLE: 'Marriage Is for White
People' The
Washington Post- Joy Jones, By Mar 26, 2006
- Pass the Aspirin, Wedding Bells Are Ringing and
Ringing and Ringing NEW YORK TIMES, By NICHOLAS
KULISH, August 20, 2006
It’s exactly this time of year, as
August grinds along, that you see young men and women suffering
from a powerful seasonal affliction. They drag through their days
looking drained, sluggish. It’s not the heat. It’s not even the
humidity. It’s the weddings. Summer is supposed to be a season of
peace, of relaxation — time to hang the Gone Fishin’ shingle and
take a break. Instead it has become a gantlet of festivities. Five
weddings in a single season have left me a nearly broken man, and I
have several friends and acquaintances who have gone to even more.
I have wedding fatigue and I am not alone. . . .
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- Parenting
issues: Fatherhood, I now learn, Is a Young Man's
Game The New York Times,
By Rand Richards Cooper, August 20, 2006
THE first time in my life I had
unprotected sex, one August night three summers ago, I was 45. No
pill or condom, no diaphragm or IUD — none of the sundry devices
deployed to keep me careering, childless, through a quarter-century
of romance with women I had lusted after and sometimes loved. This
time the woman was my wife, Molly, and we had decided to have a
baby. . . . .
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- 34-year age gap wrecks Previn's fifth
marriage Daily Mail- UK, By CAROLINE GRAHAM, August 20, 2006
It was a match seemingly made in classical music
heaven. When conductor Andre Previn married elegant violinist
Anne-Sophie Mutter four years ago, they declared themselves
"blissfully in love" - despite a 34-year age gap. But now
77-year-old Previn is contemplating the end of his fifth marriage
after the couple quietly divorced in Mutter's home town of Munich,
Germany. . . . .
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- Marriage, ultimately, requires a
great leap of faith Lansing
State Journal- MI, By John Schneider, August 20, 2006
It's the final night of our nuclear-family reunion.
The cocktails are flowing. A slab of ribs sizzles on the Weber. An
orange moon rises from the lake like a hot-air balloon. The
chitchat is 100 percent lightweight. And then ..."So, how do you
know when to get married?" my older son asks. The chitchat drops
off the deck. Nothing immediately imminent, he rushes to explain,
in response to the gasps from his sister. He's just interested in,
you know, some general guidelines. . . . . People change.
Circumstances change. Ultimately marriage is a leap of faith. . . .
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- A Bit of Humor: Marriage means
always having to say you’re sorry Denver Daily News, By DDN STAFF REPORT, August 20,
2006
Welcome to Town Talk, and we’re sure you could use a
laugh on a Monday, so here’s something on marriage we had sent to
us yesterday: - “I recently read that love is
entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me
like toxic waste—
David Bissonette
- “When a man steals your wife,
there is no better revenge than to let him keep
her— Sacha
Guitry. . . . .
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- Save your energy and sanity: just stay
faithful The Observer-UK, By
Cristina Odone, August 20, 2006
Syphilis is back. Chlamydia is out of control.
Sexually transmitted infections went up 20 per cent between 2000
and 2004. This time, though, the epidemic of venereal diseases is
not limited to youngsters raging with their hormones and against
authority. Increasingly, their mothers and fathers are victims,
too. The number of syphilis cases treated among women aged 45 to 64
is up sixteenfold since 1996; incidences of gonorrhoea have more
than doubled. Who should we blame for this new trend? An urban myth
dating back to the Seventies is of middle-class, wife-swapping
sessions where men throw their car keys into a bowl and women pick
a set at random and go off with the owner. But now, there are
swinging singles parties, gaining new popularity among divorcees,
with condomless sex as an added thrill. . . .
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- Alfresco marriage market
In China, parents are clinging to low-tech
matchmaking methods San Francisco Chronicle, By Olivia Wu, August 20,
2006
"Male, 26, 1980, Associate's Degree, 1.7 meters,
realtor-manager, 2 homes (3-bedroom and 2-bedroom), 5,500 RMB.
"Wanted: Female, 1.6-meters, Associate's Degree, steady workplace
in Pudong, kind-hearted, diligent at livelihood, 3,000 RMB." The
above is not an item in the personals classifieds, an online
service, or some dating bulletin board. Instead, the message is
handwritten in a faded felt-tip pen on a 9-by-11 white sheet of
paper, protected by clear plastic and cradled in the lap of a
middle-aged man. . . . . He's one of some 50 brokers who congregate
at the centrally located park for an informal marriage mart that
materializes every fair-weather weekend. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Seeking marriage on the streets, romantic or
what? China Daily- China, Oct 14,
2005
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- Man Wants 10-Year-Old For
Marriage Public Agenda- Ghana, August 19, 2006
A 45-year-old man from Beposo in the Pru District of
the Brong Ahafo Region caused a stir when he stormed the cottage of
a neighbour with a machete and seized his wife and children. Caabor
Sula is said to have acted that way because his neighbour, Mr.
Gyapong who is his brother- in- law had refused to give his
10-year-old daughter to him for marraige. He told the chief and
elders of Beposo who intervened that, it was their custom that a
man who married from another family and has no sister was bound to
give his first daughter to any male of the family he married from.
. . . .
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- Marriage: A fountain of youth Renewamerica.us, D.C., By David N. Bass, August 19,
2006
With cohabitation,
pre-marital sex, single-parent families, divorce and even adultery
rampant in our society, it's obvious that some Americans view
marital commitment with suspicion and contempt. By and large,
popular culture teaches that wedded fidelity is secondary to
pleasure, self-fulfillment and autonomy. Sexual freedom is seen as
a necessary and almost sacred component of life in our post-modern
age. Marriage is still a good thing, many feel, but there are a
variety of more "progressive" alternatives available that are just
as legitimate if not better. Yet this downplaying of the importance
of marriage is ironic given what contemporary social researchers
are continually finding. . . . .
RELATED STUDY: Marital status and longevity in the United States
population By
Robert M. Kaplan, Richard G. Kronick
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- Couples Join Israel's Biggest Marriage
Ceremony Totally Jewish- UK, By Lauren Wallis, August 17, 2006
Fifty couples from the north of Israel, whose
wedding plans were scuppered by Katyusha rockets, came together
this week to celebrate the country’s biggest ever mass marriage
ceremony. The sensational simcha on Monday, which was held in Tel
Aviv, was conducted by Ashkenazi Chief Rabbi Yonah Metzger and was
attended by 5,000 guests, including a representative of the
Guinness Book of Records. . . . .
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- Is
it ever too late to leave a bad
marriage? Inland Valley Daily Bulletin- CA, By Michael Stone,
August 17, 2006
Dear Michael: After going by the New Material
section at the local library, I came across "A Kidnapped Mind."
Although the story in the book was a very, very sickening and an
extreme example, I felt that it would have happened to me had I
left my marriage. I felt in my gut that something wasn't right when
I was engaged to be married and basically was convinced by my
fiancee, who had been married before, that I was immature, and knew
nothing because I came from a dysfunctional family (my dad was
frequently violent with my mother, the European doormat, and then
became an alcoholic, which worsened things). I soon learned how
dysfunctional a background he came from, although that was never
acknowledged. . . . How does one deal with "I did what I thought
was best but it screwed up my child anyways." You have no idea how
much guilt I feel, which I also would have felt had I left his
father. Is there still time for him to recover from his
losses -- an example of a good marriage, for one, and to finally
see his "real" mom?. . . . .
- Husband's incredible journey to make his
anniversary Daily Mail-UK, August 16, 2006
When Garry Mulcahy's
flight home from Spain was cancelled after the terror alerts, it
seemed inevitable that he would miss his third wedding anniversary.
But Mr Mulcahy was determined to keep his promise to be with his
wife Victoria for a romantic meal on their special day. So he
decided to go over land and under sea in a gruelling two-day,
800-mile journey that would cost him £500. It involved two taxis,
three trains, two coaches, two car journeys - and a great deal of
stress. But he made it home, albeit with only moments to spare. . .
. .
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- The Collapse of Marriage and the Rise of Welfare
Dependence The Heritage Foundation, By Jennifer A. Marshall, Robert
Lerman, Ph.D., Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, Ph.D., Hon. Wade Horn,
Ph.D., Robert Rector- Heritage Lecture #959, August 15, 2006
(Delivered May 22, 2006)
JENNIFER A. MARSHALL: This is the first in a series
of events that will focus on the tenth anniversary of the welfare
reform of 1996. One of the most important features of that reform
was to establish in policy that poverty is linked to lifestyle
issues like fatherlessness, unwed childbearing, and the loss of a
culture of work. In 1996, work requirements and caps on benefits
were some of the significant changes in federal welfare policy. As
a result of that reform, black child poverty fell to its lowest
level in history, and 1.5 million fewer children are in poverty
today. But good news like that had been a long time in coming. The
link between family breakdown and poverty had been noticed much
earlier than the 1990s. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Marriage as Anti-Child-Poverty
Program Connect for Kids.com, By Roshin
Mathew, July 24, 2006
RELATED ARTICLE: Program Seeks to Fight Poverty by
Building Family Ties
NEW YORK TIMES, By Erik Eckholm, July
20, 2006
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- Gay
"Marriage" Townhall.com, By Thomas Sowell, August 15, 2006
Now that a number of state courts have refused to
redefine marriage to include same-sex unions, cries of
"discrimination" are being heard. The "equal protection of the
laws" provided by the Constitution of the United States applies to
people, not actions. Laws exist precisely in order to discriminate
between different kinds of actions. . . . Analogies with bans
against interracial marriage are bogus. Race is not part of the
definition of marriage. A ban on interracial marriage is a ban on
the same actions otherwise permitted because of the race of the
particular people involved. It is a discrimination against people,
not actions. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: The State of the Nation on Same-Sex Marriage: Key Court
Losses Mean It May Be Restricted to Massachusetts For
Now FINDLAW.com, By Joanna Grossman, August 08,
2006
RELATED ARTICLE: The Senator who cried 'bigot' Townhall.com- By Maggie Gallagher, June 6,
2006
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- Passion dies 'as soon as a woman is sure of her man' Daily Mail, August 15, 2006
It is a common complaint for many couples. However amorous they may have been in the first few years of the relationship, after a while the passion fizzles out. Now researchers have provided an explanation. Apparently, a women's libido starts to wane as soon as she feels sure she has got her man. Scientists believe the different sex drives of men and women result from the way humans evolved. . . . . Scientists have found that after four years in a relationship, fewer than half of women say they want to make love regularly. In contrast, men's sexual desire remains just as strong regardless of how long they have been with their partner. . . .
- But not tonight, darling IFA Online- UK, By Jonathan Boyd, August 15, 2006
. . . . . Why would the male of the species continue to commit to the idea of a relationship of diminishing returns, added to which is the risk of losing one’s shirt? (I know, I know, men are stupid and never ask for directions.) . . . . . Given the propensity for divorce to destroy value, and given the risk couples who remain married may maintain an increasingly dreary togetherness, perhaps it is time financial advisers added relationship gurus to their roster of staff, to provide a truly lifetime experience that will help their client couples maintain healthy relationships, and build better long-term business for the books. . . . .
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- Saving parents' marriage not responsibility of a
13-year-old Newsday- NY, By
Amy Dickinson, August 15, 2006
Dear Amy: I am a 13-year-old girl living in a "war zone."
My parents constantly battle about unimportant things and usually
end up making me and my sisters take sides. Unfortunately, it
has always been like this. Long story short, my parents met, fell
in love and got married, already burdened with debt and family
sicknesses on my father's side. My mother was very supportive
of my dad for several years, helping him and his family
financially, opening up her house to my father's relatives. My
father never supported her as she did him during those times. Now
flash forward 15 years. They have four children, but their
relationship is broken. They are so sick of each other that they
can't stand to even touch each other. My parents are avid
Christians and do not believe in divorce. They are extremely
encouraging and wonderful parents, but they aren't open to
counseling. I've tirelessly tried to unite them again, but nothing
seems to work. Please help me. . . .
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- Parenting Issues: Heading back to
school can be tough in divorce cases Charlotte Observer, By BETSY
FLAGLER, August 15, 2006
As about 60 million U.S. children head back to
school this fall, plenty of fights are sure to crop up -- about
clothes. . . . But the back-to-school squabbles that concern
divorce attorney Sharyn Sooho the most have to do with divorced
parents battling over who pays for what. "Don't wait until the day
before school starts to settle these matters," says Sooho,
co-founder of www.divorcenet.com.
Preferably parents have financial issues spelled out in their
custody agreements, but new school-related issues continue to crop
up each year, Sooho says. Not just about clothes but who gets to
chaperone what field trip? What activities will the child get to be
involved in? Even what school will the child attend, near dad's
house or mom's? . . . . . .
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- Parenting
Issues: Co-parenting after divorce SheKnows.com, AZ, August 15, 2006
Each year divorce impacts millions of lives in the
U.S., from young children to adults whose parents divorced decades
ago. Because children can be caught in the middle of post-divorce
conflict for years, parents need to understand how their behavior
impacts children following a divorce, and strive to work together
to shelter them from behaviors that can negatively impact the
adjustment of the entire family for years to come. . . . .As noted
in the "Children's Bill of Rights," from the University of Missouri
Cooperative Extension, children of divorce have: - The right to be free from
parental conflict.
- The right to love both
parents. . . .
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- Kate Hudson Splits with
husband The Age- AU, August 15, 2006
You, Me and Dupree star Kate Hudson and her rocker husband
Chris Robinson have separated after six years of marriage, a
spokesman for the actress said on Monday. Publicist Brad
Cafarelli confirmed that Hudson, 27, and Robinson, 39, had split.
He offered no details. The couple, who were married on New Year's
Eve in 2000, have a 2-year-old son, Ryder. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Marriage break-up mystifying Melbourne Herald
Sun, Australia, August 16, 2006
RELATED CELEBRITY
NEWS: Raymond's Brad Garrett Secretly Divorced People
Magazine, By Stephen M. Silverman, August 15, 2006
RELATED CELEBRITY
NEWS: Charlie
& Denise Make Peace, For Now People Magazine, By
Ken Lee, Aug 14, 2006
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- Heather In The Sky With
Beatrice
She Takes Helicoptor After Macca Bans Her From
Home The Mirror-UK, By Fiona
Cummings, August 16, 2006
SIR Paul McCartney went out of his way to avoid
Heather Mills yesterday as she collected their daughter Beatrice by
helicopter. In a fresh sign that the break-up of their four-year
marriage is becoming increasingly messy Sir Paul, 64, had insisted
Heather could not collect their two-year-old daughter from his
estate at Peasmarsh, East Sussex. . . .
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- Divorce planners help when honeymoon is
over Independent
Online-South Africa, Aug 14, 2006
- A German company has come up with a novel idea to
help separated couples: divorce planners. Sieglinde Vauth, who runs
the Agentur Rosenkrieg, or War Of The Roses Agency, offers to help
couples on the path to divorce by mediating between spouses, giving
them advice and helping to arrange all the practical aspects of a
divorce - including sorting out the finances. . .
.
- Depressed? Marriage May Help, Study
Says FORBES.com (HealthDay News), August 14, 2006
-- With apologies to about 10,000 stand-up
comedians, marriage may be the cure for depression, rather than the
cause of it. In fact, researchers say, people who experience
depression before they get married are the most likely to get
emotional health benefits from marriage. . . . .This research comes
on the heels of another study that found that people who never
marry had a greater chance of dying early than people who were
married. In fact, people who'd never married had an even higher
risk of early death than people who were divorced, separated or
widowed, suggesting that marriage confers some sort of health
benefit, even if it doesn't work out. . . . .
- Some Thoughts on Marriage, Divorce and
Children MensNewsDaily- By Eva Ellsworth, August 13, 2006
. . . . .Changing our attitudes toward marriage may
prevent some divorces. People of both sexes have increasingly
come to see everything as being about fulfillment of their wants
and needs. Marriage is a partnership that often involves
putting the other spouse’s needs ahead of one’s own. At least
it is supposed to be: I am shocked when I watch television programs
that depict married women making major decisions that affect both
spouses without consulting their husbands. Do most married women do
this? If so, I can see why many marriages end in
divorce. Our society has not only become increasingly
self-centered, but it also expects instant gratification and that
all experiences be satisfying. Marriage may have been
idealized into something it can never be: Nothing but prosperity,
good times, great sex and perfect children. . . . .
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- Good sex is good for the
family The
Malaysia Star, August 13, 2006
I DO agree with “A Satisfied Husband” who wrote
"Ladies, good sex makes happy marriages" (Your Say, StarMag, July
30). What makes those of you who disagree ("Try being a wife, More
to marriage than just sex," Your Say, StarMag, Aug 6), think his
wife is not enjoying herself having good sex with her husband too?
Good sex would be an act of love between husband and wife, with
both deriving satisfaction from each other and enjoying it
together. . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Ladies,
good sex makes happy marriages Malaysia StarMag- Malaysia, July 30, 2006
RELATED
ARTICLE: Try
being a wife Your Say, Malaysia Star- Malaysia,
August 6, 2006
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- The Trouble with
Men uExpress.com, By Maggie Gallagher, August 8,
2006
At the highest echelons, men are doing well. Just look at
the list of Nobel Prize winners, corporate presidents, senators,
movie directors and entrepreneurs, all heavily male. But underneath
the highest echelons, there is growing evidence that men, as a
gender, are not doing so well. . . . . So why do we care? Here's
one reason: Men and women are not from different planets, we are
from the same families. When men do badly, women have a hard time
finding good mates for themselves and good fathers for our
children. . . . .
RELATED ARTICLE: Facing Middle Age With No Degree, and No
Wife NEW YORK TIMES, Eduardo Porter and Michelle
O'Donnell, August 6, 2006
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- Never Marrieds Run Highest Risk of Early
Death Newswise- British
Medical Journal, Aug 8, 2006
— People who never marry have the greatest
chance of an earlier death, reveals a study in the Journal of
Epidemiology and Community Health. The findings are based on
national census and death certification data, involving almost
67,000 adults in the USA between 1989 and 1997. . . . "Risky”
behaviours could not explain the differences, say the authors,
because the unmarried group were only slightly more likely to smoke
than their married counterparts, and they were less likely to drink
alcohol regularly. They also exercised slightly more and were less
overweight. . . .
RELATED STUDY: Marital
status and longevity in the United States
population By Robert M. Kaplan, Richard G. Kronick
RELATED ARTICLE: More People
Prefer Single Life to Marriage The Seoul Times-KOREA, By Tim Park, August 8,
2006
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- Satan Announces Opposition to Gay Marriage
Huffington Post- NY, Blogged by Toby Barlow,
August 8, 2006
In a crowded press conference early Tuesday morning,
Satan announced his disavowal of both gay marriages and civic
unions. "I know there is are a lot of people who might think I'm in
favor of this," he said, "but you couldn't be more wrong. . .
.
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- When a marriage ends, what do you do with the
keepsakes? Quad-Cities
Online, By Robin J. Youngblood, August 8, 2006
When a marriage ends there's still a nagging
question: What do you do with the stuff that reminds you of him or
her? . . . . . A recently single person should allow
plenty of time to grieve for the relationship before sorting out
the good from the bad. Until then, Ms. Ricketts said to "box it up,
put it away and, hopefully, you don't have to rent a storage unit."
For some people, however, the nagging memories are enough reason
for them to get rid of whatever reminds them of their ex-spouse. .
. .
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- A
blind date + one unhappy newlywed = 32.5 years of
marriage HappyNews.com, By
Davey Jolly, August 8, 2006
Placing your love life in the hands of others can be
a daring move—especially in today's age of higher divorce rates and
unconventional courtship practices. But as an 18-year-old in 1972,
agreeing to a blind date didn't seem like such a bad idea. After
all, my ex-girlfriend had recently dropped the bomb that she didn't
think we should see each other anymore, and Mary was my cousin's
best friend. It couldn't possibly be that bad. . . . . On our
wedding day, as I was standing before the preacher with our
families watching, I said, "I do." And then suddenly, I developed
extremely cold feet and realized I wasn't ready for marriage. . .
.
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- More People Prefer Single Life to
Marriage The Seoul
Times-KOREA, By Tim Park, August 8, 2006
Traditional norms have pushed people to settle down
and form families through marriage. Thoughts and values have
drastically evolved with time, however, and many people prefer
independence and wealth more than ever before; thus, they would
rather stay single. . . . . The number of marriages in the U.S.,
excluding only a few states, decreased from 2,366,623 in 1999 to
2,355,005 in 2000, while the number of divorces increased from
944,317 in 1999 to 957,200 in 2000. Avoidance of commitment, being
able to get sex without marriage, not wanting to make a mistake,
and the fear of financial crisis and fear of emotional stress due
to divorce were few of the many reasons why people preferred
staying single. . . . .
- Reinventing the invented tradition
of marriage The Royal
Gazette- Bermuda, By Michael McAuley, August 7, 2006
Today the law is intent on examining all
relationships of emotional, financial, sexual, and social support.
Of particular interest is the institution of marriage. In the New
Yorker a recent cartoon was captioned: "Gays and lesbians getting
married – haven't they suffered enough?" The law of marriage is
part of family law, and family law is a dismal subject. For the
most part, it deals with the end – love's final gasp – of what
might well have been a momentary liaison. .
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